Post # 1
I need your advice from anyone who has been in a similar situation or knows someone who has been. I have been with my partner for many years and we would like to get married. We had booked a destination wedding for a years time but due to family issues we decided to cancel.
We are both super shy and private people. My parents are divorced (just recent) and I don’t speak to my fathers family. My mums family don’t want him at my wedding and as much as I don’t talk to him nor has he been much of a father to me I don’t think I could not invite him.
We’ve thought of a surprise wedding but I don’t think I want that. I just want it to be me and my man because I don’t want the start of a lifetime of marriage to start off with me being upset because of not having what I want for my wedding. Follwed by a luncheon a few days later with all the family. My family were fine with it at first but now they’re saying I should have the parents there. What should I do ????
Post # 3
@Curious-gal: do what YOU want. If you just want to have a quiet wedding with just you and your Fiance, do it! Who cares what anyone else wants you to do? It’s YOUR wedding.
Post # 4
@DeathByDesign: thank you sooo much. Man this is hard. I really would love to go sign papers and be done just so I don’t have to think about it any more. It’s sad weddings have to cause so much stres.
Post # 5
@Curious-gal: I agree with the PP. In the end it will be the day you remember for years to come. You wnt it to be remembered as a happy day, not a day of breaking up fights. It’s hard, but sometimes you need to just stand your ground, offend a bunch of people and know they wull forgive you in the end.
Post # 6
I have the same sort of relationship with my father too! If I didn’t invite him, crap would hit. the. fan. 🙁
In the end, eloping was the best choice for us! I read somewhere ( the bee, I think) about it being such a bonding experience for the two of you… having such an important day all to yourselves. That made me smile when I read it.
We’re going to tell family after our honeymoon is booked, so they are less tempted to talk us out of it. We’ll announce to our friends and the rest of our familes once we’ve wed… super casually. I am not planning any parties or registering. I just want to marry my Fiance and be married in the end!