(Closed) Private wedding now, then family and friends wedding later

posted 9 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
2775 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2010

Opinions vary widely on this topic around here, but I’m in the camp that thinks it’s 100% wrong and deceptive to invite people to a “wedding” that’s not really a wedding.  If you want to get married in September, you should go ahead with your private ceremony and invite people to a delayed reception (no ceremony – you are already husband and wife so need to play-act getting married) in February.

Post # 4
167 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

I agree with sailor.  If you would like to have the ceremony in September, that’s fine.  But you should not have another “wedding” later.  You could have a reception later, but not another “wedding”.

A lot of couples get married on one day and then have a reception later.  My brother got married in St. Lucia in December and since not everybody could be there for the ceremony, he held a reception later (in May).

Post # 5
2390 posts
Buzzing bee

i think its perfectly fine to have two weddings. everyone’s situation is unique and while some wouldnt have two, that doesnt mean its wrong for you; it’s just wrong for them

Post # 6
1326 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2011 - Tre Bella, Mesa, AZ

I think it’s fine to have two as long as you are honest with your guests about the fact that you will already be married when you have the second one. It could be part of the vows or part of your story on your website.

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