- 4 years ago
So this is getting to me and it is driving me crazy.
My Fiance has 2 older brothers, the oldest is alright, not great either but not a problem. His other brother however, he is easily angered, thinks highly of himself and thinks he is king of the world. When i lived with my Fiance we did not get along and he was very rude to my family when they would come visit, he would talk bad about me behind my back (found out via texts) and he pretty much talks bad to even his own mom. He will not let anybody tell him anything. So my fiance moved back to his country and I can to visit him a while back, his brother was there and not working yet, he was a pain in the but as normal and ignored me in everything. For example, we would walk through the mall and he would ask his brother to come and grab lunch with him- he would see a two for one deal – pretty much leaving me out. My fiance tries to include me but he knows arguing with his brother isn’t going to have any effect. I bite my tongue, have done it for a long time.
Until one evening, his brother got fish from a shop and got about enough for 2 people where as we were with 4 (!) I tried to warm some of it and I burned it so we went out to go get some new fish. Once back at home he started saying things like FI and Me ate all the fish and left nothing for anybody else where as we had nothing to eat yet. He claimed he bought more fish and we all ate it – my blood boiled! I then grabbed a peanut butter sandwhich and left the room, he kept going on an on about it so I yanked the door open en yelled at him that he needed to stop and grow up. I did not name him any names. He yelled back at me and called me all sorts of things, my fiance eventually got in between and they almost got into a fight…. that evening he deleted me off facebook, twitter, instagram .. you name it. I felt horrible .. I left to go back home the day after. I almost immediately send him a message apologising for the fact that I yelled at him – the things that I said I did mean so I did not apologise for that. He never replied, I messaged him once more, on facebook and no response, I try to be the kind one and emailed him a merry christmas email and a happy bday email but both no response. I am dead to him.
Problem is, my FI mom doesn’t believe he would do this, she says it is all my fault and that I take it all to serious. Look, I made a mistake by loosing my temper, he claims to be all christian and bla bla .. but how is this Jesus like?! I am no better but I am trying hard to forgive and forget. I cannot act normal to him if he ignores me, my FI has been so mad at his mom he said he cannot come to the wedding if he cannot behave like an adult, him mom then said she wouldn’t come if he wasn’t allowed to come. Lovely.
What am I going to do? Our wedding is in October … his mom want FI to ask his brothers to be his best man, my FI doesn’t wanna know about it. And It is getting to me that he is treating me like a non existant person – if I go to him in a couple of months for the wedding I might have to live with them for a couple of months.