(Closed) Processing with FI?

posted 6 years ago in Catholic
Post # 3
Member
3697 posts
Sugar bee

I’m also debating about this. I really want to walk in with my Fiance, but I don’t want to hurt my dad’s feelings.

I’m thinking about asking Fiance if he’d like to include our parents in the processional, and get his two cents on this. It’s not only my decision, after all. I know he doesn’t want to walk in with his parents … I told him that I would either walk in with him, or with both my parents, but I don’t like the symbolism of walking in with just my dad. I love him dearly, but he and Mom both raised me. It’s a package deal or none at all.

Post # 4
Member
545 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2017

maybe he could meet you half way? So you dad walks you half way down the aisle while the fi walks towards you two then you and your fi walk down the rest of the aisle together? although i don’t know where you dad would be.. trailing behind? 

Post # 5
Member
3697 posts
Sugar bee

@kerpao:  I know a lot of people do that at weddings as a compromise option, but I’m not sure it’d be the best choice at a Catholic wedding, at least for this OP.

Having the couple walk in together at the end of the processional is the oldest and most traditional way of doing a processional at a Catholic wedding liturgy (dating back to the days of the Early Christians) because, as the OP mentioned, at a Catholic wedding the couple confers the sacrament of matrimony on each other. The priests is the celebrant in the sense that he officiates the wedding and he celebrates the sacrament of the Eucharist (if they have a wedding with Mass), but the couple are also the co-celebrants of a sacrament, Matrimony, which is why they are supposed to process in together according to the rubrics (rules) for the liturgical celebration.

Over the past few centuries, due to the influence of Protestant traditions, popular culture, etc., most Catholic weddings have also adopted having the bride escorted by her father or parents. The Rite of Marriage says “According to local custom, they may be escorted by at least their parents and the two witnesses.” It leaves it pretty open, and there is nothing wrong, per se, with doing it the way you suggest. It’s a great compromise, actually, if the reason behind it is purely sentimental and the bride wants to share the walk with both her father and her husband.

The OP, though, mentioned that the liturgical symbolism was important for her. (From Together for Life: “This directive places the couple last in the procession in orderto emphasize their primary role in the celebration of the sacrament. The bride and groom confer the Sacrament of Marriage on each other and as equals assume shared responsibility for this lifelong commitment.”) A half-and-half processional kind of disturbs this liturgical symbolism … they process in as equals, but only partway, so not really? The bride’s father is also a minister of the sacrament, except then he’s not? It gets muddy. I understand that may not matter to a lot of couples or to their guests, but for the OP, based on how she described it, I’m inferring that it might matter a lot.

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