Post # 1
hi all B2B i am in need of help and dont know what to do im not being selfish or horribal or anything but i cant help but feel horribly dissapointed with my engagment.
i have the most amazing ring which i love but the way he did it was far from
we went to brighton seafront for our 2 year anniversary and did the ussual chip on the beach but it started to tip it down so we went home (uk weather for you) after arriving home soaking wet i went upstairs to change and dry my hair.
H2B stayed down stairs and put the kettle on when i came down he was on 1 knee in the kitchen with the kettle boiling and asked would i marry him? i obv said yes – but ive always felt dissapointed there was no guesture of love nothing no speach or even a few words as to why he wanted us to get married nothing
he was dissapointed to so he decided we should tell family he did it in brighton on the beach but i am genuinly gutted.
i have sort of mentioned it before to him and he always prommises he would make things better but still 6 months on nothing i wouldnt have minded if it had been done in brighton but it was my idea to go aswell he has put thought into the ring but not any thought in how he was going to do it
this morning ive seen 3 proposals on Facebook all amazing after he left for work i just broke down in teas i have no idea what is wrong with me i have never been the jealous type EVER its not me
what should i do?
This topic was modified 4 years, 5 months ago by pixiedust92.
Post # 2
pixiedust92: I don’t see what the big deal is. He proposed while you were away on holiday and due to weather he did it inside. I think it’s romantic. It’s like rain on your wedding day; not ideal but you still get married and get to spend the rest of your life with someone. I like that he proposed in a non-theatrical way. It’s more romantic. As for comparing your situation to others on FB…stop. No relationship is the same. It shows that you are insecure about your relationship when you compare it to others. if you want to put your own proposal on FB, let it be known that it was just you two in an intimate setting and how romantic it was. Be grateful.
Post # 3
pixiedust92: As harsh as this sounds I suggest you get over it. You will end up damaging your relationship otherwise. Your ring is perfect, you love your fella, he clearly loves you. Yes your proposal wasn’t movie worthy but to be honest, the sound of getting drenched on the beach and dashing home to get snuggled up and then getting engaged – to me sounds very romantic.
You can look at it one of two ways. A disapointing proposal which wasn’t boast worthy in your eyes, OR a romantic, at home, intimate declaration of his love (even if he didn’t say it with words, he certainly made his intention clear and clearly loves you).
Don’t let this bring you down… just tell him he best say wonderful gushing things about you in his speech or there will be big trouble! 😉
Post # 4
It kinda sounds like his planned proposal on the beach was ruined by weather and he couldn’t wait any longer to ask you so he panicked and just did it! That’s kinda romantic, I mean, the ring was burning a hole in his pocket. 🙂 It sucks, but you just have to get over it, I’m afraid.
Post # 5
Firstly: congratulations on your engagement!
Secondly: you know how you’re telling people it happened at Brighton beach? Well, you don’t really know if your FB friends’ stories are the real thing either. Don’t compare your story to theirs.
My guy didn’t get down on one knee. And he did say a little more than “will you marry me?”, but like many other women, I can’t remember a single word.
Ours was in a romantic setting (the Shangri La hotel at the Shard in London), and yet the first question everybody asked was “did he get down on one knee?”.
I don’t care, for me it was the most special moment, because the man I love asked me to spend the rest of my life with him. THAT is what it’s all about, not some silly, inflated hollywood worthy proposal that you can tell your friends. Get a grip.
Post # 6
You get over it because it doesn’t matter. At all. It’s certainly nothing to be “gutted” about. I think it’s disingenuous to want a grand proposal just so you can compete on social media. The important part of the proposal is the question itself. tell him you’re not going to lie because you’re not ashamed and make that true, or drag him back to the beach to do it again but how silly!
You love your ring and it surely took some thought from him to get that together , you love your man (hopefully, you didn’t mention!) and you can have a nice fancy moment with all the bells and whistes and makeup and photos and good hair and dress at the wedding.
Post # 7
That sounds lovely! I was kind of hoping for an at home proposal, it’s sweet,
i don’t know why there is such an expectation for an OTT or lavish proposal. He’d gone and bought a ring for you and he asked you to spend the rest of your life with him. That’s incredible and all that should matter.
Take a second to rhink how nerve wracking it must be for the guy, and how much pressure they probably put on themselves.
Every time I read a post like this I cant help but feel that if you’re so hung up on the proposal not being right there’s probably bigger underlying problems
Post # 8
I like the tea rain story. It’s sounds really romantic. I would have liked something like that. My Darling Husband had kind of an elaborate plan and I ended up knowing. I feel like a simple and spur of the moment proposal is really special. I especially love the feeling of getting into dry clothes and having tea, every time you have that feeling you will remember your proposal. Congratulations!
Post # 9
- Wedding: October 2015 - The Vineyard and Winery at Lost Creek, VA
I wouldn’t be disappointed that the person you love wants to spend his life with you. Maybe it wasn’t the most movie-worthy proposal, but it doesn’t have to be! just like when you try on wedding dresses you don’t have to turn into a blubbering mess to know its “the dress”…. I feel bad for you because you’re clearly sad about it, but take a step back – realize you are engaged!! and you get to plan your wedding and your whole life together. Don’t get so hung up about the proposal – my Fiance didn’t get down on his knee because we were out in a public crowded space, and he didn’t do a poem of how much he loves me and I’m his world etc – he asked me to spend my life with him … that’s what matters
Post # 10
pixiedust92: I also think it was sweet. He wanted to do it on the beach, but it started raining, and he wanted to propose so bad that he couldn’t wait and did it as soon as you got home. Big proposals are overrated imo, no one else remembers other people’s proposal stories
Post # 11
THANK YOU 🙂
i needed to be told to get a grip and you are all right i just needed to hear it!
i do love my other half i did just feel i would have a lovly storie to tell peoople but you are right who needs one when we have each other! at the end of the day we are getting married thank you all again!
lots of love
Post # 12
pixiedust92: Ok, I can understand if you had certain expectations that you might be a bit disappointed (I see nothing that should be disappointing about your proposal) but gutted?? That is a word used to describe a break-up, not a proposal.
Post # 13
Yeah, I agree with previous posters, you just need to get over it. Proposals most of the time don’t happen like they do in movies or like they do in viral YouTube videos. Most guys don’t make a fancy speech about how you are the perfect girl for them and how they can’t live their lives without you. And you know what? That’s fine. Guys do it in their own way. My guy gave me my Christmas gift on Christmas Eve (I was 98% sure I knew what it was) and when I opened it he asked “will you marry me?” He even forgot to go on one knee until I reminded him haha. Don’t let your expectations cloud what you have with your fiance.
Also, to put things in perspective, about a week or so ago a girl wrote on here about being upset that her proposal sucked…because her boyfriend barged in on her in the bathroom when she was sitting on the TOILET. Things could always be worse!
Post # 14
“We spent a lovely day together at the beach and when it started to rain, we headed home where he put on the kettle and popped the question I was waiting for all day.”
Doesnt sound so so bad when you work out the wording!
my guy proposed at my parents house in the kitchen over breakfast and me feeding the baby. I was disappointed at first too, but when I realized how nervous he was and how he just wanted to get it out, I couldn’t have imagined it more perfectly. How charming and adorable that after three years and a baby together, he was still nervous. Maybe your guy juat needed to get it out like mine did and had no other options because of the weather.
I I think your story is sweet and personal. Tell people the truth and be proud!
Post # 15
how beautifully stated and how true that tea and dry clothes will always be a reminder! I love that 🙂