(Closed) Proposal Cop-out

posted 9 years ago in Waiting
  • poll: Is he just being lazy?
    Yes : (35 votes)
    56 %
    No : (17 votes)
    27 %
    Maybe - explain below. : (10 votes)
    16 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    10218 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: November 2010

    Maybe he was just so nervous that’s all he could do.. did he propose without the ring or with a ring?

    Post # 4
    Member
    5993 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: May 2010

    personally i feel sorry for guys – some of the womens expectations out there are huge and i think some women need to get a grip

    technically i havent been proposed to although we are now married – lets just say its R-rated but i find it a funny story and i dont sit at home resentful that he didnt get on bended knee, flowers and orchestra ect

     

     

    Post # 5
    Member
    11325 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: February 2011

    Well I think it is super situation-specific. If he proposed with some comment about how he just couldn’t wait one minute longer, that is kind of sweet. Like he was so overcome at even such a mundane moment he couldn’t stand to not ask her. 

    The not wanting to ring shop is kind of suspect though. Could go either way :/

    Post # 6
    Member
    900 posts
    Busy bee

    My fiance proposed at my house.  I was living with my parents.  He came over under the pretense of taking me out and just asked me in my kitchen.  I thought it was perfect.  He is usually such a ham and has to be the center of attention, so I was worried that he would do something over-the-top and impersonal.  In the end, he said that at the end of the day, we are low-key people and we should have a low-key proposal.  I loved it.

    But at least it was sort of thought out.  I think a ring is a nice gesture.  Knowing that your guy planned something feels really good.

    Post # 7
    Member
    1288 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2010 - Indiana Memorial Union

    My fiance proposed to me when we were in bed. None of the stuff you mentioned were present.

    Some people just don’t go for that stuff 🙂

    Post # 8
    Member
    342 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: August 2010

    My fiance knelt beside the bed with the ring and then climbed into bed with me afterwards.  No flowers and I think we went to Burger King afterwards Smile

    Post # 9
    Member
    3285 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: November 2009

    my Fiance didn’t make a big deal of it, but he did go ring-shopping and picked me the best ring ever, and waited until we went on a cruise mini-vacation to find the perfect moment…so really, it was low key but perfect.  every couple is different, but i think a little effort is nice =D

    Post # 10
    Member
    1363 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2009

    We were just hanging out on our couch when my husband asked me to marry him. We bought the ring together, and when the sales lady gave us the ring I put it on.  It was absolutely perfect for us.  Have you talked to your fiance about this?

    Post # 12
    Member
    1765 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: July 2015

    The fact that he didn’t even bother to stop her from working on her laptop before asking, didn’t make any other speech and isn’t helping her shop for a ring is really, really not cool.

    Does he think marriage is easy? It’s gonna be work too, especially if you thought the PROPOSAL was work!

    Post # 13
    Member
    4567 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: August 2010

    Normally I’d say that an at home proposal is totally sweet and completely what I want, but the fact that she’s ring shopping by HERSELF and that he’s over in an hour is completely and totally not sitting well with me. This should be really special to both of them and the fact that he can’t even make himself go with her for that… it bothers me.

    Post # 14
    Member
    5993 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: May 2010

    although my then Fiance was part of the ring shopping – when it come to any other purchase hes like “you do the ground work and tell me when you have the final 3”

    i know my new curtains is different to someones e-ring but thats what i did, i searched and researched and eventually i took him to the store and said what about these and he said yep – maybe your friends Fiance is like this?

     

    Post # 15
    Member
    1901 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: June 2010

    My fiance proposed at home – in bed, also. On valentines day. After a day of breakfast in bed, a surprise massage at a spa, lunch, choc. covered strawberries, champagne.

    I can’t imagine having the t.v. on or being in front of a computer. I know a lot of huys aren’t into planning all the romantic stuff, but he could’ve done something.

    Post # 16
    Member
    3281 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: March 2012

    I think its a total cop-out. Something similar happened to my friend, but she didnt really seem to mind. I, on the other hand was really sad that he didnt put forth the effort to show her how much she really means to him. 

    To me, its not so much receiving flowers or candy, but knowing that he took the time to plan something really special out for such an important time in my life. 

    I would have kindly asked him to try again! lol

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