(Closed) Proposing at a wedding

posted 4 years ago in Proposals
Post # 46
Member
499 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2017

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Lily_of_the_valley :  Oh shit! The male half of the couple I’m worried about is definitely like that but I think the girlfriend (it’s my friend and her boyfriend) has enough about her to know it’s not done. Did your infiltrators ever realise it was a dodgy move or are/were they just blissfully unaware?

Oh my, I really can see standing me in your shoes a year down the line warning some other poor unsuspecting bride-to-be!

Post # 47
Member
1171 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2015

I think it’s rude and tacky AF to propose to someone at someone else’s wedding.  What kind of proposal story is that?  “It was so romantic, music was playing in the background, the ambience was great, he got down on one knee and asked me to marry him.  I said yes just as the MC announced that it was time for my friend’s first dance with her husband.”  Yeah, LAME AS HELL.  I would side eye that so much that only the whites of my eye would show. 

Post # 48
Member
1887 posts
Buzzing bee

I would’ve been super excited if some of our close friends got engaged during our wedding–if, say, they snuck off to have a private moment somewhere. However, if they did it in the middle of the dance floor or similar, I’d side-eye the hell out of that. It wouldn’t have ruined the day, but it would show how emotionally immature they were, that they couldn’t deal with someone else being the center of attention for one day.

Post # 49
Member
504 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2017

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nordiclight :  Someone posted a FB video a week or so about of this exact thing happening and posted this same question.  My answer is that “IT’S MY DAY!  and I’m not sharing”  LOL.  Let this day (weekend) be about my and my new husband’s love.  Your engagement can wait.  (Yep going to go be uber-selfish on this one).

Post # 50
Member
606 posts
Busy bee

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davidswife :  I would only be mad if they didn’t ask. Otherwise….go for it, can I help plan???? I can’t believe my love inspired another match made in heaven!!!

Post # 51
Member
340 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2016

Nope. No. No way. Hell no. No chance I’d ever be OK with this… I’d be preeeetty p*ssed off… I find it very disrespectuful to make such an important day to me and my Fiance about someone else. Do it on your own time & expense. 

Post # 52
Member
184 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: February 2017

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davidswife :  no. No. NO. 

Unlike PPs, I would NOT sit there with a plastered smile. I would have the couple thrown out. 

Post # 53
Member
1882 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

Tacky tacky tacky. 

Post # 54
Member
7638 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

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Lily_of_the_valley :  I don’t understand why some bees are criticising you for being upset about this. It was YOUR wedding brunch. It’s rude to use someone else’s party to propose – especially a wedding, but any other party for someone else also.

Regarding the OP – rude at a wedding, but it sounds like the proposing couple “got lucky” in that it was a bride and groom who were ok with it.

Post # 55
Member
127 posts
Blushing bee

I think it’s in very poor taste. The proposal should be something meaningful between the couple – and I doubt someone else’s wedding or party signifies that. I didn’t spend money on my wedding so you could have a nice place to propose to your gf. 

Post # 56
Member
321 posts
Helper bee

Honestly, who thinks of proposing at someone else’s wedding or pre/post wedding event?  I think it’s pretty tacky, regardless of how close they are to the bride/groom/families or if they asked the couple ahead of time or not.  Like, were the other 364 or so days of the year not convenient for you?

Post # 57
Hostess
2997 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2014

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aussiemum1248 :  Thank you! I found the whole idea to be absurd and extremely rude! But like a previous Poster said I didn’t draw too much attention to it because that’s exactly what they wanted. 

Post # 58
Member
2006 posts
Buzzing bee

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lesbimarried : Sorry, but it wouldn’t be your love that inspired it. It would be laziness and being cheap that inspired it. You love and your big day just happened to be convenient.

Personally, if the SO of someone I was very close to (my sisters, my Maid/Matron of Honor, etc.) asked then I’d be thrilled. I’d actually be the one to suggest it. Anyone else…no mate, get your own day. It’s not so much the “stealing of thunder” or any crap like that, I would just be offended that we planned this day for a year and a half, stressed out over things that probably don’t even matter in the long run and spent a big chunk of $$$ only to have you swoop on in and take over. But then again, I’ve never been okay with people spending OUR money. That’s right, not yours, not your potential FI’s but OURS. Spend your own money. I work three jobs for our future, not yours. That may sound selfish but my whole life I have put others first (lost thousands in because of it) and I’m now nearing thirty so f*ck it, I think I’ve earned my right to be selfish when it comes to our wedding.

Post # 59
Member
1171 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2015

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Lily_of_the_valley :  Some people think that it’s okay to propose  at a Destination Wedding, because guests paid for their hotels and flights and took time off from work to attend the Destination Wedding, so it’s like a vacation to them.  I still think it’s rude and tacky.  It makes a horrible proposal story.  You got engaged at someone else’s wedding or on someone’s wedding weekend?  What’s wrong with you? 

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