(Closed) Proposing at a wedding

posted 4 years ago in Proposals
Post # 61
Member
940 posts
Busy bee

unless it absolutely had to be during my wedding under special circumstances, I would say it’s poor taste. Would they be happy if a bunch of guests proposed at their wedding?

Post # 62
Member
285 posts
Helper bee

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davidswife :  This happened at my wedding! I didn’t know about it, and apparently, the guy wasn’t planning on doing it then, but apparently our wedding was so romantic that it inspired him to propose (he has been carrying the ring around for a while). It was done very discreetly though so I didn’t mind at all, just surprised and flattered! My brother also proposed to his now wife within 3 days of my wedding. He also claims to have been so swept up by the romance of my wedding, so again, super flattered!!!

Post # 63
Member
1687 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2016

I would be ecstatic if it were to happen to my sister or somebody close. But if it was more of an acquaintance (whichnwe don’t have any invited), it might just be awkward. I don’t think I’d be pissed or livid. 

 

Post # 65
Member
489 posts
Helper bee

I would not be bothered at all. I would be excited for the couple and that’s it 😊.

Post # 66
Member
553 posts
Busy bee

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Lily_of_the_valley :  You must be a good actress. I have a hard time reacting as anything other than what I was feeling and that would mean the happy couple would get a glass of mimosa dumped on them, and a quick expulsion from my brunch. 

Post # 67
Member
7638 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

View original reply
charlie486 :  That’s a lovely story! I don’t think anyone could reasonably complain about a private proposal at their wedding. It’s the public (i.e. attention-stealing) part which is rude.

Post # 68
Member
7358 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2012

Hell no….as a bride I’d be pissed and as the person getting proposed to I would be absolutely mortified.

I think using someone else’s hosted event, especially a wedding, to make it about you is tacky, rude, and disrespectful. As for a morning after brunch or other related events (like at a DW) if it’s an event hosted and paid for by the couple you should sit down and enjoy it as a guest. Don’t turn someone else’s event into your celebration. 

Post # 69
Member
3682 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: December 2011

It’s not cool to take someone else’s event and try to make it about you.

Post # 70
Member
3107 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2016 - Surfer\'s Beach, Grand Cayman

As a bride I would be okay with it, but I would be mortified to be the woman getting proposed to in that scenario. I think the bride and groom deserve one day that’s about them. 

Post # 71
Member
1189 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: February 2016

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davidswife :  Okay, sooo… My very clueless (when it comes to etiquette anyway) husband actually proposed spontaneously at a wedding. HOWEVER, it was a quiet moment between the two of us, nobody else knew, and we didn’t tell ANYONE except the bride & groom (two of our best friends) at the very end of the night… Like midnight dance party time.

I actually still feel a little bad about it, but they didn’t seem to care at all and were so excited for us! I’m guessing it’s because we didn’t make a spectacle of ourselves or interrupt their day in any way.

Post # 72
Member
511 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2017

If you wouldn’t propose to someone at my funeral, don’t do it at my wedding. Neither event is not about you. Ask yourself, “would this be okay at a funeral?”. Wearing white? No. Showing up just for a free meal? No. Letting a baby scream loudly during the ceremony? No. Getting absurdly drunk? No.

If anyone proposed at my wedding I would definitely not talk to them again. So incredibly rude and disrespectful.

 

Post # 73
Member
3164 posts
Sugar bee

To be truly honest I don’t think i would be that fussed. At the wedding itself is a little bit icky, depending on how it’s done. I wouldn’t want to have a public proposal nor be proposed to publicly at a wedding. But if say a couple went for a walk and being inspired by the marrying couples love someone proposed and they kept it to themselves I kind of think that would be special and romantic. I couldn’t give two hoots if someone proposed around my wedding day. I would be just as joyful for my friend or family member as if it was any other day. I didn’t see the day following my wedding as being strictly for debriefing on my party 

Post # 74
Member
3164 posts
Sugar bee

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KhaleesiStormborn :  oh snap! Just posted the above and then saw your comment. I think that’s cute! 

Post # 75
Member
71 posts
Worker bee

It wouldn’t bother me at all, I think it would just be proper to ask (very gently), that way you have a good idea of when and where its going to occur. 

Perhaps a good way to look at it is that people do all sorts of inappropriate stuff at weddings; asking someone to marry you at someone elses wedding is not that bad. — The last wedding I went to, a woman (friend of the bride/groom) wore I super tight, super short dress with stockings and garter straps, she literally pulled up her dress on the dance floor and kept bending over to reveal them constantly. She was grabbing people and children, trying to dance with everyone. This was a family-focused, expensive, classy wedding. She was legit ruining the dance floor and people were fleeing from her. 

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