Here’s what I did. Although I blatently stole it from Indiebride.com I made these cards with each bm’s initial on the front and a matching envelope. I’ll only show one, it came out the best.
And then inside I wrote a little note to them asking them to be my bridesmaid and then said "please review the terms and conditions oulined in the enclosed contract" It sounds really weird and official but I was hoping would be funny. One of my bm’s said she first read it and was like wtf this has to be a joke?! and then realized it was so she thought it was funny. But along with that I had printed the "contract" out on a separate paper and folded it up inside. Below is what they came up with at Indiebride.com, but I took some of it out and changed some of the wording so it sounded a little more like me. I thought these were really cute:
My promises to you:
1) I will not assume that you are throwing a bridal shower. As a bridesmaid, your ONLY true obligation is to stand up with us!
2) I will not expect you to attend every shower or event that occurs, and if you are able to come, I will enjoy your presence as the best gift you could give me.
3) I will not request fake nails or manicures. I will not request identical hair-dos. I will not request special, matching make-up. You’re grown women who know what kind of nails, hair and make-up, if any, make you look and feel best. I absolutely will not dictate or prohibit changes to your appearance (such as hair color, tans or lack thereof, etc.)!
4) I apologize in advance for matching dresses, but I promise to get everyone’s input so everyone can feel comfortable and attractive – and I promise it won’t look like the rag on the front of this card! I will not stuff everyone into hot pink sausage casings. I will not make busty women wear spaghetti straps. Note to IBs – I’ll be mailing these in cards with pictures of an ugly dress on the front of each one.
5) My bachelorette party will not involve you making anything shaped like genitalia or anything involving lifesavers. I will not make you wear tank tops emblazoned with “Bridesmaid” in pink across the chest.
6) I will not delegate a million weird jobs to you, and I will be grateful for everything you do. I will recognize that every moment you spend on anything wedding-related is a gift in and of itself – one that deserves profuse written thanks.
7) I will make every attempt to keep things inexpensive for everyone, and to treat your time and energy with all the respect it deserves.
Your promises to me:
1) If I become one of those scary brides who can’t talk about anything other than the wedding, you will hit me in the head with a brick.
2) If I start obsessing over stupid things that no one else will notice, like whether the flowers will match the napkins and the bridemaids’ underpants, you will hit me in the head with a brick.
3) If I otherwise fail to keep my sense of proportion and/or my sense of humor about all things wedding-related, you will hit me in the head with a brick.
4) If you are forced to hit me in the head with a brick for any of the aforementioned reasons, I will not get upset or defensive in return!
5) You will attend the ceremony rehearsal and rehearsal dinner, and have at least a vague idea of the wedding day timeline (which will be provided to you in advance).
6) You will be available on the day of the wedding to help me set up the site, help me get dressed, pose for pictures, tell me if my make-up is fading, corral people for a ritualistic toss of some kind and other things I can’t forsee yet. Just generally be available to help with stuff, if needed. I’m sorry I can’t be more specific at this point, but I will keep you posted about what we’re doing and what we’ll need help with.
7) Most importantly, you will let me know right away if you become uncomfortable with anything, at any time, regarding any aspect of this whole deal. If you feel I am asking for too much, if you feel neglected by not being asked to do enough, if expenses seem to be becoming prohibitive – anything at all. The absolute last thing I want is for you to feel put upon or resentful. All I truly want is your friendship and support.