(Closed) Punishment ideas for a strong-willed 4 yr old?

posted 5 years ago in Parenting
Post # 3
Member
764 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: January 2014

I have no idea if this will work. BUt try putting glitter in a glass mason try with water (or use a snow globe) and have your four year old shake it and not move from looking at the glitter until it all settles from the bottom. I knw this is not much of a punishment but it does help them calm down. 

Another suggestion is have them put their head on a door knob and everytime they take it off it is another minute added to the time. You can chose how much time is needed. It sounds stupid, but it does wonders.

Post # 4
Member
310 posts
Helper bee

@inspiredcreations:  if you gave me a little more background information I could help you. I work with problem behaviors for a living lol.  what is the function of his behavior? What exactly is he doing? If we know what he is getting out of it we could come up with the correct strategy.

 

 

Post # 5
Member
9917 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2013

What does he want?

Post # 6
Member
469 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

Look up the theory of Love & Logic. You can subscribe to their website and they send weekly ideas of how to handle parenting situations such as behavior. 

Post # 8
Member
607 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

@inspiredcreations:  I have a strong willed 3.5 year old boy. THe only thing that works for him, as he works himself up to outrageous crying, freak outs. Is to ignore him. Totally and completely, act like he is not doing anything and you don’t notice. 

 

 I can’t get my 3.5 year old to sit in time out at all. He does the same things yours does…BUT ignoring him, by saying “your behavior is making mommy really upset, so until you can pull yourself together I am not dealing with it”. No matter what he does, grabs your feet, follows you around going “moooommy mommmy”…

it always seems after about 5 minutes of this…that seems more like an HOUR or more…he will suddenly say “I’m sorry mommy” and hug me. Then I explain why what he did made me upset and tell him I love him and give him lots of hugs and kisses.

 

Hope this helps!

 

 

( I have three and all of my children are and have been drastically different with different behavior issues, I hadn’t untill now had the experience of this out of control temper tantrum).

 

 

Post # 9
Member
4275 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

I would ignore the bad behavior and reward the good. I don’t know if that would work but that’s what I would try.

Post # 10
Member
607 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

p.s. I will shut off the TV on top of this, or take away a toy, which usually sparks this crazy behavior. If he complies I give him back his toy or tv show.

Post # 11
Member
4275 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

@Khalessi3:  

This.

Post # 13
Member
3121 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

I do NOT have children, let me preface by saying that!  I am a teacher, however, and I’ve worked in some tough places at young age levels.  One thing for the future is try not to take something away that the child can’t earn back.  Once the thing is gone and they know it’s not coming back, why would they change their behavior?

Post # 14
Member
607 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

p.p.s…..and my son would totally smash a mason jar full of sparkly water.

 

although that is super cute.

 

 

Post # 15
Member
9142 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 2013 - St. Augustine Beach, FL

@Khalessi3:  I have successfully used this technique as well. Explain the inappropriate behavior and why it’s unacceptable then tell them you are disappointed in the behavior and that you need to be in separate rooms until he calms down and is ready to behave; finally, leave him in a safe room, door open if he’s quiet or closed if he’s screaming. Check on him regularly after 5-10 minutes.

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