Purchase regret and how to deal with it?

posted 1 year ago in Rings
Post # 16
Member
562 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2021

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@minainthea:  

I think what you mention about your fiance is really important. Mine is sort of similar…the ring and proposal was basically his big moment, his time to shine, not just mine. I would focus on that. The ring can make you happier when you consider that it makes HIM happy to see  you proudly wear it. 

You know when I like my ring the best? When we’re in a certain light, I notice it’s shining and say to him “Hey baby, check this out”. The smile he gets on his face is what really makes me love the ring and reinforces that love I feel for him. Another time he was looking through my phone for a photo and came across a bunch of shots I took of the ring in sunlight…you could tell he felt really happy that I was admiring it privately. Try to focus on those moments and remember the ring is not just for you, it’s for him as well. 

Post # 18
Member
1377 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2018

It sounds like you’re not wearing it yet but have seen the finished ring?  If so, I would reserve judgement until it’s on your finger.  Give yourself time to admire it from different angles and in different lighting.  Im sure you’ll fall in love with it. 

Post # 19
Member
717 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

I would say, if you are able to pinpoint what it is and it does turn out to be a physical aspect, talk to him.

Even though you had specs picked out, maybe even tried on rings prior, it really takes a lot of experience to know what you do and don’t like. It’s possible that you know more now than you did then about your likes and dislikes, and that’s okay. 

It might be possible to return the center stone and change it out. Just my opinion, but it’s really difficult to love a ring you only like. Or to love a ring just to make someone else feel good; it just puts you in a weird position. 

Kinda like not complaining about a meal your spouse made you. The thought was nice, and it wasn’t bad, but not your favorite. Would you want to love it so much, they’d make it for you every night?? 

I know that’s a stretch of an example, and maybe you’ll decide it’s you, not the ring.

I just want to offer encouragement to talk about it if you decide “hey a G color looks different than I thought it would in this setting.” So you don’t put yourself in a situation where you secretly feel stuck up that you’re tired of spaghetti every night 😉

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