(Closed) Push back the date for a stubborn friend?

posted 5 years ago in Emotional
Post # 182
Member
1789 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

[comment moderated for baiting and name calling]

Post # 183
Member
1992 posts
Buzzing bee

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tiffanybruiser :  I also thought it was inappropriate of Snow White to rhetorically ask another bee why she had kids “if you couldn’t afford them” and try to use the financial struggles that user disclosed on this thread (in good faith to try to help the OP) as snappy comeback material. Trying to shit on people with how good you’ve got it when your own public claims to the contrary are a click away is setting yourself up to be dragged.

 

Post # 184
Member
7268 posts
Busy Beekeeper

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courtneysokal :  I still think it’s a low blow to dredge it up. I also don’t see where she lied, but maybe I missed something. Again having intimacy issues in the first week of your marriage doesn’t mean you still have them months later. Also, Just because someone can google this on their own doesn’t make it the classiest or most considerate move to go to the trouble of sharing it with everyone on the bee.

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Speck_ :  Hells yes it was inappropriate, as was pretty much every comment she made here, but that doesn’t mean it’s okay for bees to taunt her about her husband’s “floppy dick” or whatever, and dredge up things she wrote about intimacy struggles just to shame her. We can call her on her shit without stooping this low.

Post # 185
Member
1789 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

[comment moderated for baiting]

Post # 186
Member
7268 posts
Busy Beekeeper

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courtneysokal :  Ok, fair enough, I missed the part where she denied it (13 pages is a lot to weed through). Still not ok with the flappy dick remarks though, and in general pile on’s always make me cringe after a point. 

Post # 187
Member
348 posts
Helper bee

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MissMayhem :  thanks for this. Also, if snowwhite09 is still interested in advice: a straight man having sex w a woman should be orgasming much more than once every 4 times. It should be every time. If it isn’t, there’s probably a big issue. And there shouldn’t be any problems maintaining an erection for most men under 40. If not, there’s probably a serious issue. The men I’ve known under 40 who could not maintain an erection or orgasm that much were gay or cheating or both.  Not having sex for a while should make it easier for him to orgasm and to stay hard. He knows that. And he may have been trying to mislead you bc he assumed from your lack of experience that you’d believe his excuses, but they really make no sense. 

OP: 2mos isn’t necessarily a huge difference in timing. It seems odd that someone soon entering a marriage is debating the timing of marriage solely based on a friend’s thoughts. You might not be mature enough to decide about marriage if you don’t think that you’re able to make the decision of timing on your own. I don’t know you or have a definite opinion on whether you’re ready.  

I can’t say if the 2mos makes any difference. It sounds like you’ll be marrying in under a year of knowing your Fiance either way? I started dating my guy 7mos ago and we’ll be married before 1 year is up. But I’ve also known him for 20yrs, dated him when we were younger but not ready for marriage, we’ve had some of the same close friends the whole time, it’s not either of our first serious relationships, we’re in our 30s, we’ve both lived w roommates and on our own and supported ourselves and had problems we dealt with for a long time. Best of luck to you either way. It may be helpful to read through some resources online about how to decide if and when you’re ready for marriage.

Post # 188
Member
6610 posts
Bee Keeper

This thread has run its course. We’re closing for review.

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