(Closed) pushy FMIL :( just a vent

posted 8 years ago in Family
Post # 3
8353 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: March 2011

Sorry you are having to go through all of this.

My suggestion is to just not tell her anything and just do what you want. Just nod and say okay when she suggests something and then do what you want.

Post # 4
201 posts
Helper bee

Hell, youre paying for it, so that means everything should be to your (and your fiance’s) liking, not hers. How do you usually deal with her over-bearing personality, like in situations before your proposal/wedding planning? If youre not comfortable speaking to her about this, then maybe your fiance can mention it to her? It is your 1 day to have your DREAM wedding so it should be all about what represents you and your FH 

Post # 5
1213 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

@starry: I completely understand how you’re feeling. I have a love/hate-ish relationship with my Future Mother-In-Law, also. Well, future-parents-in-law. I feel like I almost have to tip-toe around his family in order to not upset them with certain things (seeing as how I’m going to be around them for the next 20+ years lol). Don’t get me wrong, I know for a fact that they love me like their own daughter, but I’m not sure how much I love them back (and most of that stems from the way they raised my Fiance and his brother– a completely separate story, but still.. etc., etc.).

My Future Mother-In-Law has had plenty of “suggestions,” but my FI’s family basically isn’t paying for any of our wedding (which is ridiculous in the first place because their side of the family is friggin MASSIVE and they literally want EVERYONE to come anddd they’re really well-off, so they should really be helping out, but aren’t). So, my Fiance and I have decided that we are doing everything that WE want because WE are paying for it. Constructive criticism is appreciated, but other than that I don’t really give a flying F what they think at this point.  

As far as calling your Future Mother-In-Law “mom,” I personally wouldn’t feel comfortable calling her that. My mom is “mom” and nobody else gets that privilege in my opinion. Maybe its just me? I dno. And bridesmaids pay for their own things now-a-days, so your Future Sister-In-Law should start saving those pennies for her headband.

I think you should stand tall and do exactly what you guys would like to do because its YOUR wedding 🙂

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