(Closed) Pushy friends sharing my news before I even got to?

posted 4 years ago in Pregnancy
Post # 2
2698 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: January 2015

blushingbrooklynbride:  I’d be pissed! But I’m not really sure what you can do about it at this point. Can your husband talk to him? If not, it may persist until you two are ready to tell everyone and it’s out in the open.

I’ve never been pregnant, but had a similar situation when I got engaged. My Fiance proposed at my parents house, we decided to just tell parents and grandparents and keep it to that for a few days so we could tell FI’s parents in person when we went home (we live near them). Well… my gramma called my aunts and uncles and even told some cousins, I was pissed. It was our news to share. Ultimately I got over it, because there was nothing I could do, then forgot about it as more important things came up… like planning the wedding. I actually haven’t thought about it until now haha… and it was like 8 months ago.

In time you’ll be more concerned with your little family and getting ready for beaner and what’s happening now really won’t matter. But, FYI; he’s a jerk.

Post # 3
2698 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: January 2015

blushingbrooklynbride:  By The Way. it makes sense to tell your boss, especially if you’re missing work/coming in late sometimes. It’s nice to give them a heads up.

Post # 4
8817 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2013

we are not pregnant yet, and while i feel like it would not want the news getting out.  i do know that some of DH’s friends have told him when other friends are pregnant before they officially announce.  it happens.  i would just try to forget it and think of the happy times to comes.

Post # 5
3378 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: December 2011

Oh my gosh, that’s SO inappropriate, I’m sorry you’re dealing with this.  And I think your response was totally justified.  I would be completely pissed, too.  I’m 6 weeks, so Darling Husband and I haven’t told anyone yet, but I’m itching to tell some people close to us and that makes me wonder if we should keep waiting.  It seems like there’s something about pregnancy that just makes people lose their common sense!  If he keeps harping on about it, I’d tell him to drop it and that he’s really pissing you off – he was in the wrong, and he needs to give you space to share your news as YOU see fit.

Post # 6
2905 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

Argh, that is so frustrating! Your friend is being a real jerk.

I’m almost six weeks pregnant right now, but had a miscarriage at 11 weeks back in January. During that first pregnancy, I told my best friend with strict instructions not to tell anyone until we were ready. Of course, BFF spilled the beans to a friend of ours who is really, really pushy and invasive. I did NOT want this friend to know, because I knew he’d drive me crazy wanting updates and especially that he’d drive me crazy trying to “help” if I wound up losing the baby. Sure enough, I miscarried and I had to avoid this friend for WEEKS, ignore a ton of his phone calls and finally had to just suck it up and have an uncomfortable conversation with him.

This time around, I told BFF again and was like, “under the pain of death, DO NOT TELL ANYONE.” Guess who he has already told? Yep, the pushy friend. I’m livid. Mostly at myself, because hello – fool me once, shame on you; fool me twice… 

Anyway – you’re not being a jerk. Your friend is. It’s your news to share, not his! 

Post # 9
5948 posts
Bee Keeper

You have every right to be annoyed.  This is YOUR pregnancy, not this “friends.”  My Mother-In-Law is great, however, she did drive us nuts when she exploded and told everyone I was pregnant (well within our family) before we were ready to.  I was only 8 weeks along and that drove us nuts.  She hasn’t done such things since.So this friend of yours needs to cut it out.  Although, the “talk” you just had may have helped.  And besides like you metnioned this is your body.

Post # 10
1262 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

blushingbrooklynbride:  I would be upset. I’m a teacher, so when eventually Fiance and I get preggers, I plan on only telling closest of employees and boss when I eventually start to show, barring any medical reasons. The rumor mill works so quickly that I don’t want to be fielding crazy questions only 12 weeks in. However, I generally believe that most people can’t be trusted in confidence and eventually that information spreads (after all it is happy news and who doesn’t like sharing happy news).

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