(Closed) Put my sister in my wedding?

posted 6 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
3688 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

Add your friend in her place. It’s not worth it, and 15 is young for a bridesmaid anyway.

Post # 4
1805 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

Make your friend a bridesmaid and have your sister do a reading at the ceremony 

Post # 5
1341 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2015

@CzechBride14:  She’s your sister not a friend and she’s 15. I personally think leave her in, but don’t really expect anthing from her.

Post # 6
337 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

@CzechBride14:  Awe, sorry to hear that. My sister is 14 and she was my Maid of Honor so I’m not sure you can chaulk it up to age. I agree with the bees above though. I would have your friend be your bridesmaid. If you want to try and include her it’s worth a shot, however it doesn’t sound like she’s really interested in anything other than being a guest.

Good luck! 

Post # 7
1006 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: February 2014

I’d tell her she’s a junior bridesmaid. If she has issue with that, then she doesn’t have to be in the wedding if she doesn’t want to.

Post # 8
263 posts
Helper bee

She can put on a coordinating dress and hand out programs! 

Post # 9
9549 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2013

I don’t think she has done anything bad enough to warrant getting kicked out of the bridal party. So keep her in. Ask your friend as well, if you want, you don’t need even sides. It sounds like you shouldn’t have asked her in the first place, but now that you have I think it would be dramacity to disinvite her. Not worth it.

Post # 10
1106 posts
Bumble bee

It sounds like you are not that close and because of that alone, I would not have asked her to be in my wedding.  However, because you already asked her, is it going to change things if she becomes a junior bridesmaid and you can put your friend in? If it will seriously impact your budget or your Bridal Party numbers because they HAVE to be even, have your sister do something else like a reading or escort or something.

Post # 11
557 posts
Busy bee

I would leave her out to be honest. I get it, she is 15, but even at 15 some girls are interested in their sisters wedding and it just doesn’t sound like she is. You might even do her a favor in leaving her out. Some teenagers just don’t want that kind of attention (I can speak from experience here). I would suggest it to her and phrase it something like :”You don’t seem to be too excited about being a bridesmaid and I don’t want to force you, if you don’t want to participate please let me know”. If she really DOES want to be part of it, and just plays her “too cool for school” attitude, she will want to stay. If not then not and you can easily and happily replace her with your friend.

Post # 12
1164 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

@CzechBride14:  can she do a reading at the ceremony or a poem/prayer at the reception? that’s how I would incoporate her, where you are still being respectful to a member of the family, yet you don’t have to spend money on someone who has no interest in it in the first place

Post # 13
287 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2015

Ask her again and explain what is required of her in taking on this role. She will either bow out or step up, then you have your answer.

Post # 14
1078 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

@CzechBride14:   ask her right up front and see what she thinks … treating her like a grown up might make her act like more of one 


so basicly just go hey are you into this (call her or the house she lives in and really talk no text) … tell her if she does not want to be one she does not need to feel like she has to … offer her a choice of bm jr. bm and then just guest and tell her you will be happy with any choice she makes but let her know if she wants to be bm its important she texts you back and is part of the wedding 

Post # 15
348 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

Can you talk to her mom?  Maybe send her a note or call and just say that you’re been trying to get in touch with her for a solid month & haven’t received any type of reply.  Explain to her that you’re wondering if maybe she’s just not into the wedding & would prefer to have a smaller role or just be a guest?

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