Post # 17
I don’t have kids, but I have tons of nieces and nephews and I want to say it sounds like you’re doing a great job! Everyone is going to throw their 2 cents in, but you need to just trust your instincts. I’m sure you’ll fall into a routine that works for you and Dear Daughter.
Post # 18
People keep telling me to put DS on a schedule too. Especially MIL; she’s relentless about keeping him awake during the evening so he’ll sleep “better” at night. He’s only 7 weeks! He sleeps when he’s tired, plays when he’s awake, and eats when he’s hungry. I’m not going to force him awake because its convienent for me, just like I wouldn’t deny him food when he’s hungry. My pediatrician said that having a schedule before 3-4 months isn’t necessary. plus, hes started creating his own schedule: alternating awake/asleep every hour or two; eating every 2 hours; down for the night between 4-5pm; eating at 9pm, 1am & 4am; up for the day around 7am. in another month or so we’ll start working on methods to sleep longer at night.
as for spoiling, I don’t think it can be done this young. All they know is they have a need (like being held/cuddled while napping) & it’s being met. DS isn’t spoiled, he’s learning that we love him & he can trust us. Keep on doing what you’re doing mama!
Post # 19
I have read that it is good to have a sort of schedule, because it helps them become better sleepers and self-soothers, but not before 4-6 weeks. A little tiny newborn just benefits from all the unlimited go-to attention- even at 4-6 weeks and after that it is up to you. I would do what works for you- every baby is different!
Post # 20
So, I would say that only you know what’s best for your child, and I am sure you are doing a great job! 🙂
I don’t have children so I can’t speak for myself, but my grandma raised me until I was three (my mom and dad were very busy with work and not very well off so they would stay with me at night every day and work during the day). So my grandma raised me by the book, whatever book that was, and she trained me to sleep all night, eat when I should, and poop every day. On command. I mean, she wouldn’t snap her fingers and WHOOP there it is…but she would put me over a little baby toilet and talk to me….I guess I understood what she was saying? And I’d poop. Too Much Information I know. She did this from the time I was around 3 months until I left her house at 3 years.
Anyway. I don’t know how she did it but she never had a sleepless night…she did the same with her kids.
Post # 21
3 weeks is way too young (in my opinion) to put your baby on a schedule. I started a bedtime routine for our DS when he was 6 weeks old because it was exhausting holding him until we went to bed around 11pm. So far that’s the only “set” time we have for anything. I decided to let my baby make his own routine. I think it would drive me crazy trying to make him eat at the exact same time every day, I like being more laid back. I think when he’s older it will be easier to to make a routine for him though.
7:30-8:00am DS wakes up for the day and I feed him. (I brush my teeth, etc then change him and dress him).
8:30am We sit in the living room and have a conversation;)
9:00-9:30am I feed him and he usually takes a nap.
10:30-11:00am DS wakes up and I feed him again, change him, and give him his medicine.
12:00pm We play, do stretches, eat if he wants to, etc.
3pm and 5pm he takes a nap. Then we play and eat until bath time (7:30pm) then he’s usually asleep by 8:15pm after I feed him and rock him to sleep.
THEN he wakes up around midnight for a snack and again at 3am and 6am.
Post # 22
i wouldn’t listen to anyones advice 😉 sorry girls. nothing personal!
being a new mom myself i think it’s best to just do what feels right to you. i listened to countless people’s advice and suggestions because they wanted to give it to me (and i’d ask) but every body and baby is different and you just have to go with the flow and try not to compare yourself to others! it will make your life so much easier.
Post # 23
@roxy821: We let our Dear Daughter set her own schedule
We set a bedtime when she was about 4 weeks old, only because we noticed that she started falling asleep for a long stretch around the same time every night. Once she had a “bedtime” , we set a bedtime routine. It was just a simple bath, pjs, eat, bed. I rocked her to sleep every night until she was about 8 weeks old. She would fall deep asleep on me and I would set her down in the crib after. After that, we started putting her down drowsy but awake and eventually transitioned to full awake when she seemed like she was ready. She was also tightly swaddled until 6 months old.
Her daytime and feeding schedule has always been pretty lax. I put her down when she seemed sleepy and fed her when she was hungry. As she got older, it eventually turned into a routine that she set herself.
When she was tiny, I did make an effort to teach her day from night right away. I kept the blinds open, made noise, etc during the day and kept her room very dark and quiet at night. I think it really helped. We eventually did have to nap-train her because she’s so nosy that she never wanted to nap.
I think it’s fine to follow your baby’s cues and let them tell you when they are ready to do things. Thats what I did and Dear Daughter is a smart, happy baby and an awesome sleeper.
Post # 24
Don’t overthink it! Just love and care for your child the way you are doing and you both will be fine. And you spoil that baby every chance you get!
Post # 25
I don’t have children but I’m an educator. I find that schedules work wonders for young children (Kinder). They need some kind of direction and they perform better when they know what’s coming. Also discipline is a breeze when they know what when and where. I recently gave this advice to my sister who babysits a child who is very difficult. She says that so far it has been working for her. Schedules help you and your child as well and I hear it’s good for their development also.
Post # 26
If she gets used to falling asleep in your arms then she is not going to want to go to sleep unless she is in your arms. My baby is almost 10 months old and ever since the day that she has come home she has been sleeping at night in her crib. She knows that if she is in her crib then it is time that she goes to bed. Ever since she was about 6 weeks old the husband and I would change her, feed her and put her to bed. By the time she was 3 months old she was sleeping all night. The best thing about getting my little girl into a routine was so that I can get into one to. I know how much time I have to relax, clean, do whatever has to get done before she wakes up or needs a feeding. I think having the baby on a schedule is more benefical for the parent for sure. But it is up to you to raise your child and putting your child on a schedule will not always work. Only you will know what is best for you and your family. The best you can do is listen to what they have to say and then you can decide whether or not to take their advice.
Post # 27
So I’m pregnant with my first. So I haven’t had all this wonderful advice thrown at me yet 😉 But I am doing a lot of research. It sounds like you are talking about the “cry it out” method or “Ferber Method” (this is big on baby training/schedules) vs. “Attachment parenting” associated with Dr. Sears (this is big on taking cues from your baby and doing a LOT of holding (slings) and co-sleeping). Personally I’m not going with Ferber Method. And I understand that a lot of people for training say that you will “spoil” a baby by holding it.
You might feel better if you pick up a book by Dr.Sears and can read about Attachment parenting- which it sounds like you are naturally doing anyway. Dr. Sears does focus a lot on the mother instead of the father, but the books were written forever ago- so in my head as I read them, I replace mother with parents 🙂 Anyway, lots of people really support attachment parenting. Don’t let people make you feel bad for it! There is lots of research that SUPPORTS that what you are doing is best for your babe. 😀