(Closed) Q&A With Mr. Hedgie

posted 9 years ago in Waiting
Post # 3
621 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

I think you scared the waiting bees away. lol

Post # 5
621 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

@Mrs Hedgehog:  It actually just might be really late at night for most bees to be online on a Sunday night.  I know it is almost 1 AM on the East Coast.

Post # 7
91 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

Will you tell us about your time spent “waiting” to be officially engaged?

Post # 8
2295 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

ahhh I just posted a question for waiting in the other board!

Sorries- let me post it here

Hello there and welcome to the boards!

Im sorry if someone has already asked this, but as I am waiting, and my SO and I are in the stages of being engaged I thought I would ask a guy his perspective

a) what was the one thing about the proposal that made you the most nervous?

b) ideally, who should pay for the ring? -I think its a combo of both, or depending on circumstances, if the tradition is not that important to you, then either partner can pay for the ring in its entirety.


Post # 11
3638 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

@Mr Hedgie: 

I think many a waiting girl will be happy to hear the ads and announcements are just as painful for the guy as they are for them.

I’m also sure that there will be many questions later on for your Mr Hedgie, I think all the waiting bees are just sleeping, dreaming of engagements to come.

Post # 13
2295 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

@Mr Hedgie: I couldnt agree with you more on the idea behind the ring-I just think that should both partners agree and are not traditional, that the lady may aid her fi to be in the expense of the ring (especially if they are students!) thanks for your perspective on the proposal 🙂 I shall remind myself to stop being so snoopy when it comes to the event!


Post # 14
248 posts
Helper bee

Hi and welcome to the boards!

I’ve got a question that I’d like your opinion on…

I got my boyfriend to agree on a timeline of our 3 year anniversary to propose by. I had previously been bringing up engagement and marriage a lot and causing fights over it in the year before. I didn’t feel loved, etc., etc. because he didn’t want to move forward. I eventually stopped the fighting and referred to an article that stated that if you didn’t know someone enough by 3 years into a relationship to decide if you wanted to marry them, then you weren’t going to find out much more about that person to make you change your mind. He agreed, and thus the timeline was born.

A few months later I felt like crap that I had convinced him to give me a timeline at all. I didn’t (and don’t) want the proposal to be forced in any way. Although he did agree that he would not propose under any circumstances until he was ready.

Our three year anniversary is the day we fly across the country to catch a week long cruise that departs the following day. Originally, I figured since we will be traveling on our anniversary that he would propose prior to then. However, I wasn’t going to hold it against him if he “unexpectedly” extended the timeline and proposed during the cruise. He came to me though and made it not so unexpected when he asked if we could extend the timeline to 4 days AFTER we get back from the cruise. I agreed even though I felt kind of disappointed.

So… going off what you said about how it was so important to you that your own proposal was a complete surprise, do you think my boyfriend extended the date so that he can still propose during the cruise and not have it be as expected? I don’t think I should read anything negative into this, but you never know. Also, do you think the timeline was fair in the first place?

Sorry if this was a bit long! Thanks!

Post # 15
600 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2006

I have a question!  Well a couple of them…

  1. What in a man’s mind is considered pressure and why is it so insanely excruciating for you males?
  2. (really 1b) My guy loves to hear me get excited about our future together, like whenever I see a cute house, puppy, or baby I squeal and say how I can’t wait to get engaged or married and have a house and puppy.  Is that pressure?  And if so, how can I stop if he secretly loves it and has told me so?!  So many mixed messages from him!
  3. As a man, how do you view timelines?  By timeline, I mean a timeframe that is not set in stone, not an ultimatum, just a decision about what would be a good time to propose.  For example, I asked my guy what his timeframe was and he said he’s bad at that (which he is, he can’t make plans for the weekend let alone a proposal) and asked for mine for him to say if it would be reasonable for him.  I said 8 months (which will be Sept) and he said that sounds “doable” and “about right.” Is this good?! 

It is so nice to have a man to ask questions of!  Thank you so, so much for buzzing into the hive.

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