(Closed) Question about Mr. Bee’s Backup Plan…

posted 8 years ago in Waiting
Post # 3
Hostess
18643 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

Why is he asking if you are okay?  Are you acting kind of sad lately?  You probably shouldn’t tell your Boyfriend or Best Friend that you are sad about not being engaged since that sort of puts the pressure on him to think you really want to be engaged.

Post # 5
Member
5670 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2010

I wouldn’t lie to your boyfriend especially you are in a serious relationship. He should be your best friend that you can talk to about anything and while I wouldn’t push the engagement issue and make him feel like that is the only reason you are sad talk to him about what is bothering you.

Post # 6
Member
272 posts
Helper bee

Why do you think that his asking if you’re okay is related to implementing Mr. Bee’s plan?  I think honesty is the best policy – and if you’re feeling depressed and strained in the relationship, you two need to talk about it.  Just leave engagement out of it, because the focus should be on where your relationships is right now, not the hypothetical.

Post # 7
Member
1106 posts
Bumble bee

I completely understand and Im in the same boat too. Its very difficult but you can just tell him you’ve been in a funk lately. If he keeps pushing the issue of what the funk is.. be honest. Just tell him that you dont want to pressue him so you havent brought it up, but the distance is really taking a toll on you. I am also in a LDR and I am very honest to Mr. Tee about when Im feeling sad about the distance..

Post # 10
Member
1106 posts
Bumble bee

Yes. I live in Atlanta and he lives in Pittsburgh and I have made it VERY clear that I wont move up there until there is some kind of ring on my finger..

Post # 11
Member
5670 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2010

Hmmm… I hear you about why you don’t want to bring it up. But I think this falls back into the category that you need to decide if this relationship is for you. If he is not going to propose and you can’t discuss the topic, how long are you willing to stay. I’m sorry to say it that way but you need to make yourself happy. Emotional support is a huge aspect of the relationship, make sure the person you are with is providing this type of support or it may be very difficult for a marriage to work. *hugs*

Post # 13
Member
2641 posts
Sugar bee

How long have you been together?  Have you spent any time discussing where you are in terms of commitment?  (Other than letting him know you won’t move unless you’re engaged….  He might not know that means you are ready.) 

I like your plan though.  I think it’s OK to talk about why you’re sad and the LDR etc. 

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