(Closed) Question for Bee's who didn't change their name…

posted 4 years ago in Ceremony
Post # 2
Member
2107 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: February 2016

Not an expert on this, kind just figuring it out as I go along…

At the wedding I was still undecided so I said it was fine if they introduced us as Mr and Mrs HisName. Since then I’ve just mentioned it in passing that I didn’t change my name, nobody really paid attention to be honest. An alternative is to say ‘introducing the newly weds’ or ‘introducing your bride and groom’ or ‘introducing for the first time as a married couple John and Sue’.

As for the title, unless you have a title that comes with land (lady) title isn’t part of your official identify. Or at least that’s what I’ve googled for the UK so I’ve used Miss, Mrs and Ms. 

Post # 4
Member
815 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2017

As far as I’m aware, if you choose to go by your maiden name you’ll be Ms. X, but that doesn’t make you any less married than if you were Mrs. Y! And I’ve never actually heard an officiant say “Presenting Mr. and Mrs.,” usually it’s just “I now pronounce you husband and wife,” and that’s that. If you want to be “presented,” maybe he can just call you “the newlyweds” or something along those lines.

Post # 5
Member
252 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2015

View original reply
herrera2016:  Our officiant just said “husband and wife,” but our DJ introduced us as Mr. and Mrs. HisLastName.  I did not change my name, and I didn’t even think of the announcement being an issue… until he said it, ha ha!  I never get offended when people call me Mrs. HisLastName.  My grandma still does not understand that I kept my maiden name, and addresses all letters to me with his last name, ha ha.

Side note: After a year or marriage, I’m thinking of adding his last name to mine (so I would be MyName MiddeName MyLast HisLast).  I go by MaidenName professionally, because that is how my students know me, but I still feel weird not being “connected” to him in that way.  Anyway, it turns out that getting a legal name change unless you are getting married or divorced is quite expensive…sigh.

Post # 6
Member
564 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2016

You’d be a ms.  I’ve never heard an announcement like that either. If it doesn’t fit you you can just cut it out. The presentment seems to be dependent on the name change to me. Like it’s a magic trick: voila! They’re married now because her name has changed! Without that change it seems weird to say anything at all. Or he/she can say “I now present Joe and Mary , husband and wife” or something.

The announcements I have heard is entry to the reception (although we’ll skip that too) and then they can just say “introducing the bride and groom” and your first names or something. 

Post # 8
Member
6879 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: April 2016

Our dj just said something like “presenting for the first time as husband and wife: hisfirstname and myfirstname!” 

Post # 9
Member
13888 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

I don’t think its a big deal if they say “mr and mrs. X” even if you aren’t legally going to be mrs. X.  However you want to be introduced is a fine answer to your problem, though!

Post # 10
Member
642 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2016

View original reply
herrera2016:  Same situation- I didn’t want to change my last time but didn’t mind being called by his last name, so they introducted us at the reception as Mr. and Mrs his last name 🙂

I’m sure they could also say “introducing the new Mr and Mrs.” or the new bride and groom 🙂

Post # 11
Member
2394 posts
Buzzing bee

View original reply
herrera2016:  We entered and immediately had our first dance, so he said “And here are the bride and groom, please join us for their first dance as husband and wife”

Post # 12
Member
587 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2016

I go by his last name socially. on paper i’m still my maiden name- until i get around to changing the info. ..  .i have a stupidly vain reason for waiting too . . . lol

I am waiting until I arrive at my fitness goals so I can take a beautiful photo. – For drivers license and military ID card. LOL. i just hate carrying around these photos where I look so bad. I know its petty and vain but its the truth. LOL

-We don’t have kids so – I really don’t think it matters what I do – or if I even change it legally. I added his last name to my Facebook – and made my maiden name my middle name. Added his last name to all my social media actually – but I’m still me on paper lol

 

Post # 13
Member
137 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2016

I didn’t realy discuss it with my officiant. I just told him I wasn’t my last name. He said “I present you, myfirstname mylastname & hisfirstname hislastname”  

Post # 14
Member
594 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2017

Why not ‘I know present the happy couple, John and Jane’.

 

And yes, if you are keeping your own name, you are a Ms, not a Mrs.

Post # 15
Member
252 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2015

View original reply
herrera2016:  yep. from what I hear, it is a pain. Besides not being ready to change my name right when we got married, it was also a lot of work and I was already stressed enough from the wedding. I’m still deciding on whether to add his name. Maybe when we have kids? UrgH. Part of me is jealous that he doesn’t have to deal with any of this. 

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