Post # 1
I have a friend that I am decorating her daughters wedding for. I have been working on this wedding for about 6 months now. The idea’s have changed many times…some due to cost and some do to things just evolving. Everytime the bride comes over to see something she is excited…BUT, I always ask her. Char, don’t you want to be involved in this? Isn’t there anything that you would like or….dislike? Her answer is always NO…your have it handled. I love your idea’s and I am going to have the most beautiful wedding.
Then when we are over at our friends house her mother will ask what else I’ve done and then say things like it almost seems like your the one getting married. REALLY? Well can I get some ideas or input please. Then again the same response, Char is not a creative person. She has no input and believes you will take care of everything.
Here is my delima….girls and please help me so have I can work thru my feelings on this. EVERYTHING I have done is DIY. The only thing ordered for this wedding was the invitations and everytime I ask how is that going I get an answer like well we start addressing them. I send her e-mails to see how things are going and then get very little response. Is this normal for brides. If you have a friend that you know suits up and delivers at every event would that make you less stressed or more. EVEN if you had no say so in anything except…OHHHH AWWWE I love it! Wouldn’t you be contacting me and making sure I was on sedudule. The wedding is August 21,2010. I have 100 things left to do (100 things already done) But how does she know that. Wouldn’t you be in contact with me alot now! The wedding is close!
Whats wrong with this picture? HELP
Post # 3
I would probably be calling you, but I am doing pretty much everything myself… But I have heard about brides who genuinely don’t care and want to leave all of the details to someone else. So maybe she really doesn’t care or just has complete faith in you. I would just keep her updated over phone and email. If you don’t get payment then I would be worried. But if she doesn’t contact you I would not feel bad about her not being involved since that is her choice!
Post # 4
Nothing is wrong with this picture. She’s just not really into weddings. Pretend she’s a guy and you’ll see that her actions are very much in the range of normal human behiavor. As long as you’re sure the wedding is going to happen simply enjoy the lack of interferrence.
Post # 5
I would be calling you a zillion times a day…but thats just me…firstly i never would have given a task like this to someone as I like to have control over whats being done.
That said I have a friend who got married 5 years ago and did nothing for her wedding…seriously…the day of she said “oh i guess i should decorate the church or something!” so the FOTB took off to the dollar store and some ladies randomly at the church decorated. My FH and some of the groomsmen decorate the hall and she showed up later to say it “looked fine”….she hoenstly just did not care. On a side note thoughl…she regrets not being involved in her wedding now….
Post # 6
@Arachna: I thought the SAME thing! As unusual as it is, she just doesn’t want to deal with the wedding. Some brides are like that and drive their wedding planners crazy! Just keep doing what you are doing and I think it will be fabulous!
And good for you for being such a great friend! I’m sure they appreciate all your efforts.
Post # 7
Well, it sounds like she truly loves the things you are doing and put you in charge because she knows she can count on you. If you need her to be more involved I would say it would be a good idea to let her know that although you want to help you want more imput.
My mother and I are completely opposite when it comes to planning a wedding. I plan in circles by how things feel and look, she plans by a checklist. It gets easier at times just to step back and not care but I keep pinching myself and jumping back in to say, ‘hey, this is my wedding.” I have been tempted to turn it over to the moms and be suprised though, especially when the budget can’t really do what I have in my head. Does that help??