(Closed) Question for mothers/those trying to conceive/those who KNOW they want kids.

posted 6 years ago in TTC
Post # 4
Member
2286 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: Central Park

I don’t have kids yet but I think this is all very normal. We want kids, but sometimes I worry that I will be a horrible mother. I think everyone has these thoughts beforehand. 

Post # 6
Member
4192 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: July 2012 - Baltimore Museum of Industry

I don’t have kids, but those sound like completely normal worries. You’re getting closer to the reality of kids, vs. the dream of them, so of course these thoughts come up.

And who says who can’t have a rockin’ bod after kids? 🙂

Post # 7
Member
14657 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

I think it just more scary when it becomes so real.  I’ve always wanted kids and now that we’re TTC, I’m sort of terrified.  I think the terrified feeling will stick until I get pregnant, then mayabe the excitement will kick in.

Post # 8
Member
4464 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: February 2012

My husband and I have a plan to start TTC this summer. While I have great maternal instincts and dream of having children, I’m SUPER scared. To the point where if everything that I am trying to accomplish doesn’t fall in line this year I may start making excuses to push it off. I hope not though, I hope I’m ready when I’ve said I’m going to be since I have this year to accomplish what I need beforehand. Anyway, my point is, it’s probably one of the all-time scariest decisions to make in life. Bringing a child into this world is no small feat and it changes your life drastically for the rest of your life. However, I think that the scarier the prospect, the more rewarding and wonderful and I think that’s probably multiplied 100fold when it comes to having children. 

Post # 9
Member
986 posts
Busy bee

I’m actually trying to change my habits and body now BEFORE kids, because even though we’re young, I know that when we do start TTC I should probably stop with eating fast food 24/7 and working out …never, haha. So I want to get healthy now, and when the time comes, hopefully I can be healthy for 2.

I think all your concerns sound legitimate. Like I said, I’m not TTC yet, but everybody has concerns!

Post # 10
Member
1856 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

Yeah, I never wanted kids. Mine came about unexpected and early, and I certainly just made the most of it. Obviously now I think she’s pretty awesome. I think it’s a pretty normal feeling to feel a little unsure of how it’s going to go, how you’ll cope with other people’s influences/opinions, whether you’ll *like* your life after.

Post # 11
Member
7770 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2010

We decided we were going to be happy either way.  Then… I made two life plans- grad school now for an MFA (I was preparing my app this fall) OR have kids and figure the rest out later.  I am someone that goes 100% for whatever is working out in life- so now I am 100% dedicated and excited.  I know it is a big huge decision, and it should be.  But really, don’t care what anyone thinks – that is always a loosing battle.  I have a family that judges (as in- treats you badly and looks down on you and makes fun of you for- ) ANYTHING.  I think having kids gives you confidence not to care because you get this momma bear thing goin on- I think you have to not care whatever you decide, people might seem to be judging you no matter what you do-  but really, the decision is yours.  It is SO good to think it through though!  A friend once told me to prepare for everything I want and what works out is meant to be- that is pretty much how I manage life. 

PS  I don’t think there are perfect parents- I think you just do the best you can.

Post # 12
Member
2335 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

I have always wanted kids but now that it’s physically/financially/relationship-ally possible, it freaks me out. I think it’s totally normal to feel that way.  Why shouldn’t you be nervous about being a mom?  It’s not like you’ve done it before!  🙂

Post # 13
Member
1527 posts
Bumble bee

I was scared to be a mom to my stepdaughter, but your instincts kick in hardcore and it turns out amazing. There are hard moments, but there are so many amazing moments too. It’s a huge change, and having your own baby makes it about a million times different. 

You have to decide if it’s worth it for you. You are giving up A LOT. I rarely get to get out with my hubby. The idea of being able to just leave the house when you want and do whatever you want for however long you want to is really foreign to me haha. But I wouldn’t change it for the world.

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