I’m am over 50, so maybe that makes a difference… growing up Manners and Etiquette were huge.
It was taught at home… and it was a trait that Adults were expected to have mastered (in same realm as knowing how to excuse yourself from a situation, what to do with a napkin, and which tiny plate next to your Dinner plate is YOUR Bread Plate… and which one belongs to your neighbour)
So ya, there was no way I’d have ever mis-read an Invite be it 30 Years ago, or 30 Minutes ago
In my lifetime I’ve been to absolutely dozens of Weddings… first one I was a toddler.
Many of the ones that happened when I was a kid, meant I was either Invited ONLY to the Ceremony (as Ceremonies are truly open to all if they happen in a Church)… or to BOTH the Ceremony & Reception.
If it was only to the Ceremony, my Parents usually got us a Babysitter, or did a workaround with other relatives. Many a memory of a gang of cousins all in one Hotel Room, watching Tv, eating pizza & popcorn, and having a “rotation” of Aunts come to check on us… Aunt Sally for an Hour, Aunt Martha for one, Mom for one, Aunt Gail for another etc.
We didn’t see it as a punishment, that is for sure !! It was a party in our minds.
Occasionally, I wasn’t invited at all, that seemed to happen more as I got older (the late 1960s early 70s) and I was a Teenager.
Primary reason, I imagine was (a) It would have cost more for a couple to feed me, and (b) I was actually now old enough to stay on my own for a few hours… be that at home for a local Wedding, or in a Hotel Room for an Out of Town one.
I have to say, YES I was a bit offended that I wasn’t invited… BUT when I grew up and Planned My Own Wedding (first one circa 1980), I have to say I UNDERSTOOD WHY… Weddings were / are super expensive. Lol, back then $ 25 to $ 50 a head was the norm for a sit-down event… Now goodness gracious I hear of Brides here on WBee who are looking at $ 100, $ 200 or even $ 300 a head (all in). YIKES !!
Anyhow… as I was brought up with Manners & Etiquette Knowledge, when I had my own kids, I totally understood how to read an Invite and what my choices were as a Guest.
I could ACCEPT or DECLINE based on the parameters / choices that were presented to me.
And so, ya we had the same sort of experiences as my Parents did… some Weddings with the Kids, and some without. No big deal.
Hope this helps,