(Closed) Racist Fiance

posted 6 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
Member
9916 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2013

I am so, so sorry to hear that you are in pain…but anyone who would use the N-word like that does not deserve your love.  

 

Was this the first time you heard anything like that from him?  I imagine he had a lot to say during the election…?

Post # 4
Member
137 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

I’m very sorry to hear this. But I commend you for your bravery for standing up for something that is extremely important. I hope some day that you will be able to find someone who is a greater and deeper love and will be more open minded.

Post # 5
Member
5400 posts
Bee Keeper

I can’t imagine being engaged to someone after being together for 18 months and having no clue he’s racist. Seems fishy….

Post # 6
Member
4930 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2018

Oh wow…. I’m so, so sorry. At least you knew before the wedding, instead of after.

Side note: I’m from north Georgia too! 

Post # 8
Member
492 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

I am sorry to hear that  your relationship ended. How long were you dating him before you realized he was racist? unfortunately people like him arent uncommon. I was raised in an area where I was a clear minority but didn’t realize it until much later in life due to the acceptance of diversity in my town. This topic can be touchy so I won’t say too much, but I pray that one day our nation will learn to accept eachother no matter the differences.

Post # 9
Member
9053 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2010

Wow, I’m sorry about this, but I’m blown away that someone who is deeply/staunchly racist was able to hide it for so long?!? 

Good for you for knowing yourself well enough to know that this isn’t acceptable to you.  I’m glad you’re able to find peace with your decision, and hope you can move forward to find someone worthy of your love.

Post # 10
Member
625 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

@talljabride:  +1

You did the right thing. I’m surprised he was the one to end it all. It just proves that your decision was the right one. I’ll never understand how a person can hate an entire group of people without ever knowing them. He should be ashamed of himself.

So very sorry you are going through this.

Post # 11
Member
1227 posts
Bumble bee

I have so much respect for you. You are a very brave woman with incredible integrity and values. Be strong. 

Post # 12
Member
492 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

@SapphireSun:  yes it seems very strange that he was able to hide it for so long. Maybe he finally felt comfortable enough to just say how he felt.

Post # 13
Member
2934 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 1996

I’m so sorry that you just found out about this — what a horrible shock it must have been! I wish I could give you a real hug, I have so much sympathy for you. But I admire you so much for not marrying him when you know that you have opposite views on something so important. You are doing the right thing. I’m sorry you have to.

Post # 14
Member
203 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

Sorry to hear this…hugs. 

Post # 15
Member
83 posts
Worker bee

That sucks you had to go through that but you shouldn’t give up on love! Also,How was he able to hide his racism for so long!?

Post # 16
Member
607 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

I could never be with someone who had those views, even if I wasn’t mixed, that’s not the type of person I could excuse or be in love with. racist, homophobic, religious, and conservative right wing republican. I couldn’t.

what bothers me about your post is “as racist as he is”, so a little racist is ok

he hates black people but it’s cool…oh wait he used the N word…now he’s a REAL racist?

 

 

 

someone like this is throwing up clues all day long. I think you saw them but it wasn’t that bad…then he used the N word and you hit your boiling point.

 

 

 But it’s good you decided that someone with this much hate in thier heart you can’t possibly love.

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