(Closed) Random invite requesters- I wanna hear your stories!

posted 8 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 77
Member
2457 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

I haven’t had any people really inviting themselves yet (tho I’m fully waiting for that to happen).. Well my MOH’s mom wanted to bring her old creepy married boyfriend but I said noooo way to that and she didn’t really push the subject. 

Something else that happened along these lines, though… So my Fiance has what I like to call a fake sister. She’s this girl who moved into his mom’s house a year or two after my Fiance moved out (he moved out around 23 and that was about 6 years ago) and she has stayed there since. She’s 21 now and about as smart as a box of rocks, so I sometime try to give her the benefit of the doubt, but this was ridiculous. Anyhow, she’s become a fan of popping in on FB chat to say “HI, sister in law!” – which I hate because she’s def not his sister and I can’t stand this girl. She’s that chick who has all of the ducky face, boobs hanging out pictures as her prof pics on FB.

She was in a breakup recently (and got back together with the idiot) so she came to me for relationship advice. Even tho I can’t stand her I listened and tried to be nice. Big mistake – next thing I get is, “I know I’m invited to the wedding and everything already (no you’re not!) but can I be one of your bridesmaids? I have never been one before and just really want to be in your wedding.” 

UMMM NOOOO!!! 

*sigh* she lacks all knowledge of human etiquette.

Post # 79
Member
2137 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

were having a SMALL courthouse wedding and then dinner with CLOSE family and friends, probably 20-30 people in total. I posted on my fb that my date was set and what kind of wedding it would be and FIs cousin which we barely met 9m ago was all ” ill stop by your wedding”

uhhh no you wont. lol

Post # 80
Member
5427 posts
Bee Keeper

Before weddingbee, I would never think that I was rude to ask if I was invited to someone’s wedding. I don’t think free booze or free food, but a fun thing to do to support the bride and groom on their big day. Plus, I would be giving them a gift or cash so I would think my meal was paid for… anyways that’s what I thought….

After weddingbee – Now I wouldn’t even think of asking anyone for an invitation! LOL

Post # 81
Member
576 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

@Kenic315:  Oh my gosh, you hit the nail on the head. I grew up in a Baptist church, and am having my wedding done by my pastor back home. Most girls post their wedding up on the bulletin board for everyone to come, and they announce it in the church service!! Needless to say, I explained to my pastor that only people that I have known for a long time will be invited, and not to announce anything. And they seriously do only have punch, mints and nuts! hahaha

Post # 82
Member
5091 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: January 2012

My mom tried to invite her friend to the rehearsal dinner (that DH’s parents paid for). 

It was a bit of a weird situation, since I’ve only ever talked to this lady a few times anyway, and she never would have been invited if my parents hadn’t insisted and then paid for her.  She really really really wanted to come to our wedding for some reason, even though she lives in Ohio and the wedding was in Texas and she couldn’t really afford the trip. 

My mom started out the conversation telling me this woman’s sob story about how she’s raised her grandsons on her own and how a chance to go on vacation to my wedding is going to be soooooo nice, and so my mom had decided to help her out with the costs by sharing a hotel room with her (even though my mom and dad are still married, and so my poor dad ended up in a separate hotel room with my brother)…  And so, my mom said, her friend absolutely needed to be invited to the rehearsal dinner because she would feel very awkward if she was left in her hotel room alone.  My mom offered to pay for her if it would otherwise be a problem.

NO.  NO NO NO NO NO NO NO.  I barely know the lady, and she kind of annoys me, and the rehearsal dinner was for people in the wedding and their immediate families ONLY.  My mom threw a fit and said that her friend was going to feel so awkward since she’d be the only one excluded, so we needed to give her special consideration.  WTF?

My mom only finally backed down when I reminded her that my half-aunt (my dad’s half-sister, who was flying down for the wedding alone because her husband and kids couldn’t come and was sharing a hotel room with my grandparents) wasn’t invited, even though my grandparents were.

Yeesh.

Post # 83
Member
489 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

I can’t believe how many people come out of the woodwork once you get engaged. We just sent out our invites this week, so I have yet to get any people asking where there invitation is, but this past weekend I did come across this girl who has actually known my fiance for a long time because her brother is friends with him. But both of us DO NOT like her. She is rude, obnoxious, a former drug user, and a year or so ago we were at a party at her brother’s parent’s house and one of the people with us started getting really sick right outside the door as we were leaving. She had the gall to tell us “I think you guys should leave”, even though we were already out the door. Anyways, we ran into her and her new boyfriend this weekend and as we were saying our goodbyes she tells me “I can’t wait to see you at your wedding!” and then her bf says “Yeah, me too!”. I just looked at her with what I’m sure was shock in my eyes, then I smiled, nodded and walked away. Totally awkward. She is definitely not invited.

As for FB, we have purposely not talked about the wedding too much on there because right away people start asking when the wedding is, where it is, and all that – and of course these are all people who are not invited. I just ignore their questions, but if anyone is rude enough to invite themselves or ask about it, our standard answer is “We wish we could invite everyone, but we can’t”. Period. End of story. It is our wedding and who we invite is up to us.  We aren’t paying thousands of dollars to surround ourselves with people we never hang out with and only occasionally “see” on Facebook.

 

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