Post # 1
I live in Alberta but I am from Ontario. Naturally that means a lot of my family and friends are still there.
I go home once per year, every year ( I’ve been here for 5 years) and spend my hard earned money to go home and see these people. Has anyone come to visit me? NO.
I tell one of my best friends, just so you know, we are looking at May 2013 for a wedding date and it will be out here so she can start saving. She tells me “I would love to come but probably won’t be able to afford it” AHHHHH…I just want to scream. I had to vent where noone “knows” me as I don’t want to air dirty laundry in public places.
Has anyone else had issues like this?
Post # 3
I had a bridesmaid who lives in Nevada back out and tell me she wouldn’t be able to come to my wedding in Georgia because she may be losing her job and wouldn’t be able to afford it. However, I lost my job in January of 2011 and had already obligated myself to be in HER wedding, so my fiance and I spent $2K to go out there. What really chaps my ass is that she’s constantly posting stuff about trips she’s taking on FB. Her husband went to Vegas for a “guy’s week” and was talking about dropping $500 at the tables. (I told her we would have a place for her to stay, AND get her to and from the airport, so she would only have to pay for an airline ticket.) Around Christmas, she and her husband took his 3 kids to California for a week. AND, she bought him a *HUGE* gun safe. (Granted, he is a deputy and DOES need to keep his guns locked up around the kids…) Yeah, I’m a little miffed too… >.<
Post # 4
This happened for my wedding too. It’s sad and disappointing, but it also shows you who your real friends are.
Post # 5
On a similar theme yes. The thing that annoys me is all the complaining about it. If it were me I would do everything (and I mean everything) within my power to make it to an important event like this. Forgo my vaction, hitch a ride, etc. People are so self absorbed sometimes.
If you want you can read my post: He’s only emigrating… <rant> (it’s Not Wedding Related, but I know how you feel!)
Post # 6
I’m very sorry to hear that your friend might not be able to make it. But, it is unreasonable to be upset at her for not being able to afford to come to your wedding. You don’t know her finances.
Post # 7
@Lemma: I think you’re missing the point…the wedding is over a year away. Put away $10 a week for the next year and you’ll have MORE than enough. To me, it says, “You’re not important enough for me to put forth the effort.”
Post # 8
@FlutterbyBee: Maybe she’s living paycheck to paycheck. Maybe she’s in debt already. You never know with these things. Even if she could afford it, it still would seem quite rude to me to be upset that a friend isn’t willing to spend her hard earned money on me.
Post # 9
If shes spending her money on the things above, which is not a neccesity, then she should be putting money aside for your wedding. Trips, a trip to Vegas,etc,etc is definately an extra! Totally agree flutterbybee. I think she just didnt want to go. If she did, she would have put her money into her trip to the wedding, not other things that are considered extras in life.
This is true at least with your Bridesmaid or Best Man. What was the outcome of your situation?
Post # 10
Thanks for understanding and I’m sorry you all have your own things to go through like this!
The point is, I have a lot more debt than her and she still has the nerve to ask when I’m coming home all the time, and even with a year and 4 months notice, she can’t effing afford it?!?!! are you for real?
As @FlutterbyBee: has stated, she could put away just a little per month in order to afford it! I’m expected to spend thousands to go home and visit every year tho!! Ridiculous!
Post # 11
@futuremrsparsons: You know though I figure that if people really want to come, they will do what they can to go. But if they dont want to, then they wont even try to make it.
At least you now know and you wont have to worry about having difficulties later on with her. Ive noticed that people who dont want to go,but say they do,are big pains through the planning and then they aventually say they cant come.
You’ve probably saved yourself some grief.
Oh and instead of going back there this year and next year , save that money for your wedding, honeymoon or even a house.
Post # 12
I’m the opposite! From Alberta, living in Ontario for 6 years, getting married back home in Alberta where everyone can easily come. The major downside is that I don’t feel comfortable inviting friends out here. I’d like them to come to my wedding but I seriously feel like a little brat asking them to pay for a round trip flight to get out there. Mostly just family has ever come to visit me. I definitely feel like we’re the ones making the effort to keep visiting, too. Thing is though, we have many people back home we are going to see and if they come out here it is really just to see us. It sucks and I sympathize big time, but it’s not so much your friends in particular as it is just… how it is.