(Closed) RANT on crazy FMIL drama

posted 5 years ago in Family
Post # 2
13903 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

1: You basically told her to pay for the reception if she wanted there to be one.  Therefore, she gets to make the decisions.  Whoever pays gets a say.

2: Your fiance needs to tell her to address her issues with you WITH YOU, and not with him.  He needs to take the lead on this one to tell her, and he needs to follow through out not listening to her complaints.

3: Let her get ready where she wants, and don’t cater to her temper tantrum.  Tell her that she is welcome to show at 1 to use your stylists, or you can meet her at X Location at X time.  She’s an adult and will do what she wants, and there’s no reason you should have extra stress because of it.  

Honestly, your Future Mother-In-Law doesn’t sound that bad to me — she sounds like she’s trying to take an active role in your wedding.  There may be some miscommunications, and you, of course, have a lot of extra stress with the upcoming wedding.  I’d just try to minimize your contact with Future Mother-In-Law and stay positive.

Post # 3
421 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2017

Yes, I have a crazy Future Mother-In-Law too.  We let them know around May 1 that we had set a date for October.  Let’s see, her first move was to pitch a fit and tell us we’re not “allowed” to get married (cultural issues, she thinks she’s my boss).  After we got past that hurdle, she’s tried to basically blackmail me for a couple thousand $ or else we can’t get married (long story on that one).  Any decision I make is totally wrong according to her.  Fiance is in the middle and unfortunately does not put her in her place (that’s also a long story and something I’ve mostly come to terms with).  She doesn’t like my idea for my mom to bake a cake, so she’s providing an additional cake.  She insisted on FI’s brother and sister being in the wedding party (we didn’t want to have one at all).  I could go on, but I’d be here all day.  MIL’s are nuts!

Post # 4
371 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2018 - City Hall

I think your first mistake was letting her have a reception as long as she paid for it herself. This gave her the power to do a lot in your wedding, since whoever pays, gets to decide a lot of stuff. I wouldn’t have even let her do that, but 4 days prior to the wedding is way too late to go back on that. Just let her do whatever she wants, it’s basically what you’ve done anyways, ignore her, let her style herself and be late or not, you’re getting married in 4 days to the love of your life! Woohoo!!

Post # 5
849 posts
Busy bee

View original reply
buzzybridetobeee:  Don’t let her stress you out–this is your’s & your finacee’s time. I would talk to your fiancee and let him know that you’d like to cut back on how much your Future Mother-In-Law is asking you questions & such because it’s stressing you out. Let him take over–it is his mother, so he should be able to handle the situation with more ease. 

Also, if she doesn’t want to accept your gift of hair & makeup kindly tell her that it’s okay, you’re disappointed because you wanted to do something special for her, but you understand if she wants to get ready at her own house–you will see if another female relative can step in so you don’t lose your payment. End of story.

Just relax–it will be okay 🙂 Enjoy your special time!

  • This reply was modified 4 years, 6 months ago by  janna121215.

The topic ‘RANT on crazy FMIL drama’ is closed to new replies.

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