Rant! Tell me your crazy fmil/mil stories!

posted 8 months ago in Family
Post # 2
Member
156 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: February 2019 - City, State

She’s totally out of line! And if that’s the best complaint she could come up with, I bet it’s an awesome venue!

My dear mother couldn’t wait 24 hrs after we got engaged before calling with demands about the wedding date, location, which work trips I can/cannot go on with my fiance, etc. She also said like 6 times at Christmas that I couldn’t wear a ring this nice. So in our relationship, it’s definitely my poor fiance getting used to his crazy Future Mother-In-Law. frown We added a “nuclear option” column to our wedding planning sheet because she’s been so wild, lol! 

Post # 4
Member
156 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: February 2019 - City, State

That’s brilliant! Totally copying the Mom disclaimer. And thank you so much!! 

Post # 5
Member
862 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

I told my mil i didnt want a wedding and she told me she was going to throw a party whether or went or not. Then proceeded to try and have us marry inside her house agaisnt my wishes of a simple court wedding . No no no ma’am 

Post # 7
Member
1403 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2021 - Kauai, HI

#1-  MIL cuts an article about natural family planning and gives it to me.  (Get out of my sex life!)

#2 –  after he left me for a 19 year old coworker, she asked me “are you making yourself available to him?”.  (Yes but go away!!). 

Post # 9
Member
361 posts
Helper bee

newgreenbee :  I’m sorry! Invasive inlawss are the worst.  Just stand your ground with them on the bigger stuff and ignore smaller things that can be ignored.  You are not out of line. If they aren’t paying, they dont need to be included.  Include them in smaller moments less important decisions or not at all depending on how pushy they are moving forward.

In my experience it will only get worse from here.  If it makes you feel better, my mil wanted to wear an actual beaded wedding dress with a train to my wedding.  She fought with my husband about it for months.  My IL also love to criticize how we spend money, which is especially annoying as they failed to reimburse us for  several thousand dollars of hotel rooms and travel expenses, despite being asked repeatedly for the money. She calls me fat and my husband lazy.  (I’m a size 6 and hubby is working full time in a stem field while pursuing his masters part time.)  My Mother-In-Law always makes other people feel better abt their crazy inlaws…

So it could be worse…  In retrospect I really wish I had called them out on their crazy earlier! They got way worse as the wedding got closer.  Moving forward I will have no more of their nonsense.  Talk to your hubby and establish firm boundaries with them.  Of course the crazy builds slowly over time, so it’s possible yours are just as nutty… I hope not!!!

Post # 11
Member
361 posts
Helper bee

newgreenbee :  Yes, I decided my mil couldn’t come dress shopping with me, but I invited her to come when I picked out a veil.  Guess who bought a hair piece that was a replica of mine?  It really depends how crazy your inlaws are.  Less is more until they prove themselves.

Post # 12
Member
8774 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

newgreenbee :  “We’ve decided to inform/ pre-warn vendors of her ways anytime fmil comes to appointments” — You’re making this hard on yourself. The only reason to bring her to appointments is if you like the excitement and drama of having to warn vendors about her. If you just want to plan your wedding in peace, take your husband’s advice and leave her out of it. Yes she’ll complain, but as you’ve seen, she’s going to complain regardless.

Post # 13
Member
750 posts
Busy bee

The information train needs to leave the station without MIL! She gets no information, no coming to appts and tell her you want her to be surprised and delighted on the day of when she attends as a guest, not wedding planner. 

My Mother-In-Law has been great so far (knock on wood!) but my side has been lots of unnecessary drama. So they are only finding out the date, time and where to show up from here on out. 

Post # 14
Member
1891 posts
Buzzing bee

It’s none of her business but you knew that when you decided to tell her. Wrong call btw. You won’t have a problem with her if you stop telling her details that aren’t her call. If you continue to tell her details knowing this is how she acts than it’s now a you problem not a her problem. 

 

 

newgreenbee :  

Post # 15
Member
3117 posts
Sugar bee

Your fiance knows his mother and tried to set a boundary. He knows her best. Stop overriding him and trying to involve her. You created this issue.

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