(Closed) Rational advice on baby names

posted 8 years ago in Pregnancy
Post # 32
Member
2259 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

We’ve been asked if we’re going to keep family names, too and the answer would be ‘no’. I know people who have gone by their middle name all their lives but that was mostly their choice their parents named them Hermione or Horatio…. no offence to anyone with those names! 😉 If my kid ever wanted to use their middle name as their first, that would be up to them. Otherwise, that’s kind of what middle names are for…? my 2 cents. 

Post # 33
Member
923 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: January 2013

I have several friends that go by their middle names and they all say that they wish thier parents had chosen to make that their first name instead. 

Of course, if we have a son he will be Franklin MiddleName LastName, V (the fifth) and will be called Finn.  Finn isn’t neccessarily short for Franklin, but rather comes from the old American slang for a five dollar bill.  So, I don’t suppose I have any reason to talk. 

Post # 34
Member
595 posts
Busy bee

Aside from the “family tradition”, maybe he just wants his son named after him.

My cousins name is Daniel Harry but for some reason everyone has always called him Harry…… I’ve always thought his first name was Harry and didn’t realize what his actual first name was until a few years back! That doesn’t make much sense to me. The child should be called by their first name like you said.

If you really really want the other name as the babys 1st, then I would seriously try and talk/convince him otherwise. If not, you have to agree on something, and as you said your man seems pretty set on his son having his first name as a part of HIS tradition with HIS child.

Personally, I don’t see what the harm in the baby having the same name as the father, regardless of whether it runs in his family or not. At least he will have the favorite name you both liked as his middle one.

 

Post # 35
Hostess
11163 posts
Sugar Beekeeper

I have been going by my middle name my entire life. It is not as complicated as it may seem.

Yeah at school, work, professional situations you have to correct people and every once in a while someone will use my first name and I will respond (like doctor’s office). However, it hasn’t really been a burden and most people don’t even know what my first name is anyway.

Post # 36
Member
7768 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2010

Because it seems so important to your DH, I would let him have it.  I know many many people that go by their middle names- professionals.  It is not a problem.

If my DH values something that much I would honor it.  Also, will the baby boy be “David Jones the 3rd” or something?  Then I would definitely honor it, but either way.

Post # 37
Member
2861 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

He wants his son named after him, I think that’s something I’d give in to. To dig your heels in about something like that is pretty hurtful to him I’m sure.

Post # 39
Member
2015 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

lets hope you have a girl then!! I have to admit my uncle has always been know to myself as Uncle Barry. I only recenly learnt that his name is actually John Barry. My other uncle whose name is Christopher is always referred to as George (his middle name). i have no idea why!!

I understand the tradition and if it was me in this situation i would allow him to use David as a first name and call the child michael if you could have sole desicion of a baby girls name 🙂

Post # 40
Member
1302 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

I would not have a problem with your husband’s preference.  I would have to REALLY REALLY HATE the name to reject a family tradition.  I don’t think that you should question his relationship with his family in this way.  Maybe this is a way for him to feel connected even though he’s not close to his dad or grandpa.

My husband’s middle name is the same as his deceased father’s first name.  It’s an ethnic version of the name Frank, and to be honest it’s a little weird sounding.  But if we have a son he will probably have the same middle name to honor my Father-In-Law.

I don’t think the middle-name-as-nickname issue is such a big deal.  Just keep all legal documents with his proper name, and let him be Michael socially.

Post # 41
Member
1667 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

I go by my middle name – my first name is a traditionally male name. And a family name. I’ve never really minded. All of my IDs are the same, full name. Though when I get married I will probably drop the first name (sorry dad) and be Middle Maiden NewLastName, which I feel guilty about a bit but they were the ones that called me my middle name!

Post # 42
Member
620 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I actually like the family name as first, but call him the middle name – but I’m from the South, where that is SUPER common, so perhaps it’s just a regional thing.  To me it is SO much better than a “Junior”!  My brother goes by his middle name and hasn’t ever had much trouble with it.  Sure, he had to correct people the first time he met them if they had the full name written down somewhere (like with a new teacher the first day of school), but I also have to do that to people who try to call me by the super common nickname that lots of girls with my first name go by (and I hate).  But of course, it’s your and DH’s child, so only you two can work out a solution that you’re both happy with. =)

Post # 43
Member
983 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2015

My SO and his twin brother both have family names as their first names and they go by their middle names. All legal and goverment documents use their full name and it gets a little confusing simply because sometimes on less formal documents (like our gym membership) my SO will use Middle LastName but at the video store will use First Middle LastName. It’s more confusing for me because I don’t know what name he is under. Socially, it’s never been a problem. We all just refer to them by their middle names.

Post # 45
Member
3774 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: December 2004

Yep, it is a pain to go by my middle name.  I wish my parents had just chosen a decent name and got on with it.  Give the baby the name you want him to be called.

Post # 46
Member
2538 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

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@peachacid:  Gold. Big fan. lol

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