(Closed) Reading at Ceremony? Is it written by the person?

posted 5 years ago in Ceremony
Post # 2
Member
2803 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2015 - St Peter\'s Church, East Maitland, and Bella Vista, Newcastle

It’s usually a poem, book excerpt or bible verses – it’s not like a eulogy at a funeral. I’d be confused if I was a guest at a wedding and someone read something they’d written themselves.

Post # 3
Member
742 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2017

Agree with 

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KiwiDerbyBride! I went to a wedding with someone reading a little thing about the couple and it was super weird and uncomfortable. That’s more of something for a rehersal dinner or reception. 

Post # 4
Member
663 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2015

Yeah, it’s typically a biblical verse, a poem or whatever. 

Post # 5
Member
14095 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

It’s typically something written by someone else.  Would your dad rather make a toast at the wedding before the dinner, similar to a best man or Maid/Matron of Honor speech? 

Post # 7
Member
14095 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

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becca0505 :  Sorry, read it too quickly.  At the rehearsal dinner, then?

Post # 8
Member
2622 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2017 - Hogarths, Solihull

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becca0505 :  Why can’t they both make a speech at the reception?

They’re both fathers at the end of the day, it doesn’t take the limelight away. 

We’re having my Dad, one of the groomsmen and Fiance make a speech at the Wedding, but if his Dad was still with us he’d have 100% been invited to say a few words!

 

Post # 9
Member
2617 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2016

At our wedding, both fathers did a speech….

Post # 10
Member
1023 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2016

Both sets of our parents gave speeches at the wedding. My dad felt plenty special.

Post # 11
Member
1601 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2016

Multiple people can make toasts at the reception. We had five different people give toasts. I don’t see how that takes away the limelight from anyone of them…

Post # 12
Member
571 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

Maybe it’s OP who wants to keep the limelight on her dad for some reason?? when he gives his reception speech.   If you’re not going to let your Future Father-In-Law do a reading or speech at your reception the only time he can do it is at the ceremony.  So just put on a smile and be gracious about it.  

Why don’t you have him do his talk before you walk down the aisle.  Let people be seated.  Then He can stand up there with his son, welcome everyone, and thank them for coming and say a few words.

Then that will be over with and you can just have your full ceremony without the interruption or break in the pacing.  

Post # 13
Member
541 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2026

If it isn’t a religious ceremony, I think having him personalize the reading is totally fine. I took an excerpt from a reading I found online and rewrote it but mentioned that I was inspired by it, as I took the overall format and message of the reading. I am having my officiant read it, though. I think you could pick something out for your FI’s dad if you are worried about what he picks (or writes).

 

Post # 14
Member
4917 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

We asked both fathers give speeches/toasts at the reception – my dad still got to walk me down the aisle and do the father-daughter dance, so he got plenty of time in the spotlight (not that it was a concern for him or us). 

Keep in mind that this day is just as important for your FI’s dad as it is for yours! While a reading is typically a text selected by the bride and groom (we had two poems), there is no rule that it CAN’T be written by the reader. It’s up to you, your Fiance, and your FI’s dad.

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