(Closed) Ready for a child???

posted 6 years ago in Babies
Post # 4
Member
2548 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I wonder how old you are. The reason is, that the longer you wait, the harder it can be potentially to be able to get pregnnt on your own. Seeing as how you already may have difficulties, this is something to think hard about. Needing fertiliy treatments can be very very expensive. It may be better to start trying in March, and try to figure out your finances now, even if it mens working part time, to make up for food and gas, if you don’t want o liquidate your entire stocks.

Post # 6
Member
2889 posts
Sugar bee

You say your biggest worry is financial. Have you considered how many children you want? If just one, I think waiting a bit longer is not so bad but if you want several and you plan to SAH for 2 years with each, you should also consider the possibility that you may not be able to get back into the work forces as easily and quickly as you anticipate (between kids or after). I think you also have to seriously consider what you are willing to give up in order to be a Stay-At-Home Mom. Is liquidating your stocks which are seemingly a good investment a smart long term decision? We have about the same amount invested in stock and I see that as the last place we would look to for cash. The actual cash in your account is prob. making less interest than inflation so you may want to reconsider where you put your emergency fund and where your living money comes from. Could you just reduce some “trips and extra fun” in order to divert that money to baby expenses and preserve your investments and savings? From my personal perspective, waiting a year or 2 more (and enjoying child free life) is not so bad. 

Post # 7
Member
1301 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

@ppplll6:  You sound like you are in a great place financially and that your Darling Husband is willing to work things out so that you can be a Stay-At-Home Mom. It sounds fantastic. I would go for it! At 26 yo are still young, but as you have known fertility issues I wouldn’t wait any longer. 

Best of luck!!!!  

Post # 8
Member
772 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2011

You guys are in a great place, though I can see the hesitation with your plan to stay home.  I heard a great piece of advice the other day: you are ready when you are 85% there.  Sounds like you are ready!

I would wait to quit your job obviously until you get pregnant or go out on maternity. 

Post # 9
Member
1471 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

As someone else with potential fertility issues, we have decided that once we are married, and are at a stage where we earn enough for shelter, healthcare, minimum student loan payments and to put food on the table, we will start TTC (this may take 6 months or so, due to immigration and work permits). This is about 5 years ahead of where we ideally would like to be financially and career wise (FI will be in grad. school. I’ll be trying to obtain a US teaching credential, which, if I’m unlucky, may involve more school, and then enter the Us teacher market, which isn’t pretty). It sounds like you are both at the food on table stage, so I would suggest going for it. As I am sure you are aware, fertility treatments can take years to work.

If you start now, it means you have the time to make a really good go of fertility treatments, and, if that doesn’t work, have time to consider other options (fostering, adoption etc). If you were to wait a few years, you may find that you are able to have less success with fertility teatments, and time is less on your side.

You know your situation better than I do though, you need to make the decision best for your family 🙂

Post # 10
Member
575 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

My husband and I are stressed financially as well, but we just remind ourselves, our parents raised us with a lot less than we have now, so we know it can be done. We may have to make some sacrafices but we felt it was more a priority for us to be young parents then super well off parents….

Post # 11
Member
622 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

i say go for it. life is short. if you want to have kids, you should start trying. everything financially will work out because it sounds like you’re responsible and have a general plan in place. i always say, if the girls on 16 and pregnant can do it, then you can do it 🙂

Post # 13
Member
453 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

You say you have $1000-$1500 leftover each month, even after fun.  Start putting that into a baby fund immediately.  Then even if you start trying in March and get pregnant right away, by the time the baby is born, you will have $15000-$22500 in just your baby fund without having to liquidate your investments or touch your emergency fund.  If your husband’s salary covers all bills except food and gas, if you can keep your food and gas expenses to $625-$930/month (depending on how much you’ve saved), which you should be able to, you’ll probably be just fine financially. I say go ahead and start trying in March.

Post # 14
Member
400 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

@ppplll6:  Try living off of one income until TTC… Even though you kow it may take longer TTC I wouldn’t freak out because that gives you extra time to save! I felt the same way I wanted to have a certain amount of money in the bank b4 TTC. I am about half way there and we are TTC.   So I look at like each month that I am not pregnant gives me ans extra month to save. Hope this helps

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