(Closed) Realllly uneven bridal party, is there anything I can do?

posted 7 years ago in Grooms/men
Post # 3
Member
1562 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

It is totally fine to have an uneven party. It won’t look bad at all.  What is important that you both have your closest friends/family up there with you on the day. Don’t try to fill in his side with people that he isn’t close with. 

Post # 4
Member
761 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

@ delirium.megans….Exactly right.

OP, your wedding will not be any “better” just because you have an even-numbered bridal party.  In fact, if you start adding people for the sake of symmetry, you are going to end up with more headaches.  You really want the people in your bridal party to be invested emotionally in your wedding.  If they aren’t, they may start causing problems for you (guys not getting fitted for tuxes on time, not showing up to the rehearsal/rehearsal dinner, etc.).

Trust me, on your wedding day, you are not going to care about whether your bridal party is symmetrical or not!(and it’s not going to affect your marriage either!)

My advice to you is to stop worrying about it.  Good luck with your planning!

 

 

Post # 6
Member
761 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

Fair enough – it’s the little details that will drive you crazy and make you lose sleep. 

For me, the little things (they seem huge at the time!) I stressed over didn’t impact my day at all, and to be honest, I didn’t even THINK about them on the wedding day.

I also had an un-even bridal party (5 girls, 3 guys) and we had an amazing time.  My fiancé also felt strongly about not asking guys he didn’t have a close personal relationship with, and since I didn’t care, that’s what we went with.  The pics look amazing, and not one guest made any comment about them being uneven.

Try not to let it stress you out!

Post # 7
Member
328 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

I don’t think it’s a big deal! I was in a wedding where we had 4 BMs and 6Groomsmen. The first 2 BMs/GMs were paired 1-1, and the last two BMs were paired with 2 GMs. It sounds like you could do something similar, but opposite pairings. I think it’s totally okay to have uneven sides these days and a lot more common! Besides, most of the time at the ceremony, the BMs and GMs aren’t standing next to each other anyways. They also announced each person individually at the reception, so it didn’t matter that we had perfect “pairs.”

Post # 9
Member
3461 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

If you really care about the “look” but don’t want to add people for the sake of adding, then you might think about rearranging them and put three gals on each side along with a guy. 

But honestly, I say not to worry about it.  It’s too late to cut your side and if he doesn’t want anyone else, then so be it.  I myself felt quite strongly that those on my side ought to support me and those on his side ought to support him – so if he wanted his sister up there, then he ought to ask her to be on his side, I wouldn’t be putting her on my side just because she was female.  Does he have any female friends he might want to ask?

Post # 10
Member
250 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

Could you have 2 girls walk in together after the first 2 sets of Bridesmaid or Best Man and GM?

Post # 11
Member
5110 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: November 2011

It doesnt matter if the numbers match. What matters is that you both have the people that you love the most standing up there with you! Nobody will think twice about it!

Post # 13
Member
7609 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

We’re having a hard time with this, too.  I have my 3 girls and I couldn’t imagine not having all 3 up there with me.  Fiance, on the other hand, only has 1 best friend.  So, 3 and 1?  It will be pretty obvious.  Plus, my Mom’s a little….rigid when it comes to traditions and will think it’s insane if we don’t match up, ugh.  He’s been toying with trying to ask 2 of his friends, but they’re just not close and it’s awkward as hell.

So yeah, sorry I’m not much help, but I am in a similar boat.  To be honest, I DO think it would look a little strange with 6 and 2, just as it would with 3 and 1.  That being said, though, I agree with PPs that it doesn’t matter how it looks, only that you have “your people” up there with you on that day.  Who cares what people might think (and some might not think anything of it!), you don’t really want to ask just anyone to be up there just to even things out.  Good luck!!

Post # 15
Member
526 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

If the guys you mentioned possibly adding are guys who you would ask to be your own attendants, I say you should ask them.  I don’t think it matters which side an attendant is standing on for the ceremony- they are there because they are close to one or both of you.  One of my BM’s is my FI’s sister, who I’ve only met twice, and one of the GM’s is my brother who my Fiance barely knows.  Instead of having boys on my side and girls on his, we decided that the whole bridal party would be our collective group of close friends and family. 

Post # 16
Member
2808 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

@TinyTina: We are uneven as well and it kind of bothered me at first (nothing compared to the meltdown my Mom had), but I’ve seen tons of situations where it ends up being fine. I have five girls, but between ushers and Groomsmen Fiance is probably looking at around 10-12! What’s most important is that you each have who is important to you.

Could you skip the pairings as a whole? Just have them each walk indivudually and I’ll bet that would look nice too. Problem solved! Trying to force the symmetry will only give you a headache…instead of trying to force a solution, adapt to what you have ๐Ÿ™‚

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