(Closed) Really?!?

posted 7 years ago in Babies
Post # 3
Member
1212 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2012

Not TTC myself, but I know the feeling. Finding out my 16 year old neighbour was pregnant because her super-christian parents didn’t let her take sex ed and never educated her themselves, while watching my step mum go through round after round of IVF. Really?? 16 year old kid with no money, no education, and unsupportive parents gets a baby, but my parents who have a stable home, income, and buckets full of love don’t? Really?!?

Luckily my parents did get a baby girl eventually. She is 16 months old now. 🙂

Post # 5
Member
146 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

Yea, my 17 year old cousin just became a dad, with his 16 year old girlfriend.  My grandmothers response was “well we thought you would be next”.  

We have been TTC for 13 months now….  boo

Post # 6
Member
10366 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2010

You’re jealous of someone who is pregnant with a baby she didn’t want with a guy she barely knows?

 

…..really?

Post # 7
Member
1763 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

I really dislike these converstaions. I think OP has really good intentions and put it well when she said she wasn’t upset with her fiend, but with her own body. I think that is where the focus should be. Who are we to say that someone is more deserving to be a parent then someone else, definately not our spot.

Post # 8
Member
1363 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

@aandmklover: I completely understand your frustration. We’ve been TTC for almost a year now. In that time, 2 of DH’s unwed and young cousins became pregnant. Not fair, is it?

And then to see facebook updates, receive baby shower invites and the like, rubs salt in my wound.

You said that this thread is the place to vent, so there’s mine! good luck TTC!!

Post # 9
Member
9824 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

@penguinsaremyfriends: Ditto. I was an unwed 23 year old who liked to party when I got pregnant, to know people would look at me and think “That’s not fair” or “She doesn’t deserve it” seems pretty unfair. Best to focus on your own situation.

Post # 10
Member
200 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

I don’t think she said anyone didn’t deserve it, she just said she is jealous. Which is a pretty normal response when someone gets what you want when they don’t even want it. It’s just the sensation that the universe is playing mean jokes. She said it was about herself, not whether or not her friend deserves a child or even wants a child. I know that everyone sees thing through the filter of themselves, but I think your personal experiences make you overly sensitive to a preceived slight, and not understanding of OP’s feelings.

Post # 11
Member
5977 posts
Bee Keeper

@penguinsaremyfriends: I definitely agree with you. My story is more about my luck than being upset with unwed gals having unplanned prengnancies.

Yesterday was my “really” day. I found out that there were 3 pregnant women on my floor…then on the train home, I mistakenly went on facebook, and in my news feed, one of my brother’s good friends announced his wife’s pregnancy. Now…all of these people are happily married and have been trying just like us, but after 9 months of TTC, and coming off of a miscarriage in June, I just wanted to scream yesterday. As much as I wanted to try to be happy for all of those people, I couldn’t help asking myself why that couldn’t be me…or that it was supposed to be me since I was due in December, but lost the baby.

Damnit. 

Post # 13
Member
1763 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

@Miss Peach Tree: I wasn’t really refering to OP, which is why I said that she had a very good way of making her vent about her feelings. But other PP did make comments to that point and I don’t think it is anyones place to make those judgements.

Post # 14
Member
1363 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

Can’t a vent thread be just a vent thread? I was not placing judgement on anyone. It’s just frustrating that, like OP said, you are ready to try and try as you might, your body is not co-operating. Yet, those who aren’t trying…. wed, unwed, young, not young…conceive.

I just thought it was a thread for those who are feeling frustrated.

I apologize if anyone felt judged. That wasn’t my intention at all.

Post # 15
Member
1493 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2009

@aandmklover: Hugs! I know the feeling very well. Sometimes I feel like we’re left out of the club of babies. We’re not officially trying, but it feels like our day will never come either. I offer you lots of hugs and sympathy!

Post # 16
Member
2742 posts
Sugar bee

Hmmm, bees. Okay, so one can’t vent anymore?  This is someone who is TTC and she’s coming here to vent. That’s why I really think sometimes folks should think twice before posting on the babies board or the waiting board. If you haven’t been there, it is sometimes hard to be empathetic is allz I’m sayin’ To the OP, I haven’t been in your shoes but I do know folks who have and it’s something they think about too. Your day will come soon 🙂

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