Post # 1
so i have not started dress shopping yet. my first appt at an alfred angelo is Sept 17th and i’ve been super exceited looking at dresses online that i may want to try on.
my mother (well, grandmother by blood but she raised me.) seems to think i should just choose some ugly plus size gown that fits and be done with it. ugh! i’m a street size 18/20 and am drinking tons of water to get any bloating taken care of (i am a soda addict so this has been difficult)
i know i wont look good in every style of dress but just sticking to the “plus size selection” is not an option. some of those dresses are just the worst things i’ve ever seen lol with tons and tons of material and no shape
it’s so frustrating every time i send her a picture of a dress i might like to try on (she lives in another state) and she sends back an email basically saying i’d be too fat for it
my Fiance says stop sending her ideas (sounds easy enough right?) but i want her involved, it means a lot to me
ugh, i just don’t know what to do
Post # 3
Wait until she sees you in the dress. Don’t send her pictures of skinny models in normal size dresses. Once she sees you it will change her mind.
My dress was a size 18. It was not a stereotypical plus size dress.
Post # 4
Listen to your Fiance. Please.
She can still be involved without making comments that make you feel less than confident. I am a street size 20 and my wedding dress is SOOOO not the “typical bigger girl dress.” I agree that a lot of those are horrible.
Btw, I went to David’s with semi-low expectations and found an AMAZING dress that is neither a “fat girl dress” nor boring. 🙂 There is hope, I swear!
Post # 5
I understand how you feel – the fact that bridal is usually at least two sizes up from my (already too big for me) street size can feel awful sometimes, and I have had some confidence issues about that already, even though I haven’t actually tried any dresses on yet.
But you have to remember, you are *not* a size. You are going to be a beautiful bride, and fortunately, a lot of great wedding designers offer a wide range of sizes. Just check to make sure the brands you are browsing have offerings in your likely bridal size (Alfred Angelo definitely does!), and the next time your mom makes a comment about how you should get a plus size dress instead, just cheerfully respond that AA (or whoever) DOES make this dress in plus size!
Post # 6
LISTEN TO YOUR Fiance, GIRL! HE’S ABSOLUTELY RIGHT!
If your mother is unable to see a gown you like without making a weight comment, stop sending her pictures! I’m a size 10 and even I had to second guess certain dresses from seeing the pictures of a size 0 model wearing them.
I know you want her to be involved but sometimes it’s just easier to take the loss and be happy, not feel down about yourself. Who the hell wnats to feel like a chubbo before they go try wedding gowns on?!
You’ll look beautiful on your big day, and you know you will! Stop fretting over what she says/thinks and go forward and try whatever dress you want to try on! Good luck and I hope all goes well and you find an AMAZING dress!!!
Post # 7
Listen to your Fiance. She can be involved in other ways. Being involved this way isn’t working for you.
Post # 8
Why dont you show her links of us Plus Size gals in our dresses?
I hate when mothers, grandmothers, aunt, cousins, friends do this to us. You do not know what will suit you until you try it on YOUR body. The dresses you LOVE online, might look hideous in person and vice versa! (I know that from first hand experience)
If she isnt being the support you need, you need to find another support system/group/person, you need to be uplifted and encouraged esp. in dress shopping!
Alfred Angelo is a great place with plenty of size selection, making it that much more pleasurable of an experience for us Plus Size gals! Have a blast and enjoy it! Try on ALL silhouettes to find what you like and dont like; you might be surprised!
Post # 9
thanks ladies! it’s just so super frustrating- i would almost understand if she was thin herself, but she’s not- so she should really understand how frustrating it can be being a larger size without people adding to it
I’ve been putting off dress shopping to begin with because of my size, but i know unless i want to get stuck with something i don’t like i need to get on it
I’ve lurked around these boards for months now and I’ve seen so many of you guys in BEAUTIFUL dresses, that’s what gave me the courage to finally make a dress appointment
Alfred Angelo is my first in Sept and the weekend after that i have one at David’s bridal
also i noticed a lot of ladies have had good luck with Maggie Sottero so i plan on making an appt with the bridal shop around me that sells her dresses as well
dress shopping shouldn’t be so stressful! LOL
Post # 10
Maggie Sottero is AMAZING! I’m wearing the Venecia. I guaruntee you’ll find something of hers if you’re unable to find a dress from anywhere else. Good luck, lady!!
Post # 11
@harleyquinn29: Dont be discouraged. I was at first and I tried on some dresses and they were fab. (http://boards.weddingbee.com/topic/1st-dress-shopping-trip)
I think some people have this perception that all big clothes are ugly and thats where her mind is with it. I know you want her to be apart and in on your happiness so it might be best to send her pics of you in the dresses (Since she is in another state) and that will change her mind about things…
Good Luck and Enjoy the moments….