(Closed) Really dislike MIL's "grandma" name…what to do?

posted 7 years ago in Babies
  • poll: Should I say anything to MIL regarding her "grandma" name?
    Tactfully bring up the sound-alike factor, and that you're not the only one who's noticed : (67 votes)
    39 %
    Keep your mouth shut and get over it : (99 votes)
    58 %
    Other--please comment below : (4 votes)
    2 %
  • Post # 3
    602 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2010

    I really don’t see this as a huge deal.  The baby could say a number of things before “mommy”.  Since she has already been doing it for a while with your niece I would just let it go.

    Post # 4
    7778 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: October 2010

    My 11 month old daughter is saying the words dog, ear and cracker so far.  Has never said “mommy” yet.  I don’t think you should worry about this.

    Post # 5
    1766 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: April 2011

    I’ve never heard “Ammi” before.  Is this a name for grandma in a specific culture?  If so, I’d probably try to let it go.  However, if your Mother-In-Law made the name up, I’d tactfully bring up the resemblance to “Mommy”.

    Post # 6
    2622 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: November 1999

    I can see why these are thoughts, but in the grand scheme of things, its a small issue.  Its just as likely she could say baba or other word for bottle, doggie, dada, etc. as her first word. And as soon as she is babbling away it wont matter what you two are called, you will each have your own special role.

    You could ask Darling Husband to ask his mom if its OK if your child calls her “such and such”. Just have it picked out already. If she asks why, just say the two names are little to close and are afraid it would be confusing the first year for your child. If she pushes back, let it drop. 


    Post # 7
    1184 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: April 2012

    My maternal relatives have made up names that are intentionally easy for babies to say and are close to “mama”.  My aunt is Meme and grandma is Dama.

    First words will be Mama not Mommy anyway.  By the time she says Mommy, she will be able to differentiate Ammi.

    Post # 9
    2780 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: October 2013

    My Future Sister-In-Law runs a daycare from her home, her daycare kids have a tendancy to call her “momma or mommy” while in her care, not due to anything she has done, just because its easier for them to associate her taking care of them during the daytime with their mothers caring for them the rest of the time. Its more of a comfort thing to them. I don’t think you should worry about it, your child may say “dada” before momma or mommy, they tend to say the word most often heard on a regular basis thats esy enough to pronounce, unless your Mother-In-Law is with them 24/7 trying to get them to say ammi then you have nothing to worry about, you can’t control what they end up saying first.

    Post # 10
    9816 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper

    In my experience, kids usually end up picking their own name for loved ones. We tried to get our daughter to say “Grandma” and “Grandpa” with my in laws, but she calls Mother-In-Law by something completely made up and Father-In-Law by his first name.

    With my parents we tried to get her to say “Grammy” and she calls my mom “Mimi” and my father “Da”.

    Don’t worry about it yet, it’s just going to happen in it’s own organic way.

    Post # 11
    94 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: May 2011

    I know that Indian muslims and Pakistanis use Ammi (pronounced umm-me) to refer to their mothers and sometimes grandmothers. I would personally let it go though especially if she will be watching your children simply because I think you will need to pick your fights and down the road I’m sure there will be more important concerns.

    Post # 12
    1882 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: June 2010

    The baby will name the grandmother. My mom wanted to be called MiMi when my first nephew was born. He called her Jojo (her name is joann). My daughter calls her (to her dismay) calls her gokgok    (I have no idea…)

    My daughter said “mama” at ten(ish) months and at 16 months now says mommy. It takes a while. Daddy, dog, ball, and cheese did not take a while. LOL.

    Post # 13
    5670 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: August 2010

    I would just refer to her as grandma and then when you child is old enough he/she will call her whatever she decided. My aunt wanted to be Grandma and her first grandchild chose Mima, but her 7 other grandchildren call her a version of Grandma. So not all grandkids have to call them the same. If your Mother-In-Law says anything just say I like Grandma a little better.

    Post # 14
    1624 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: July 2012

    I actually think your child is more likely to say “Dada” first anyway, so I wouldn’t worry too much over what names comes out first–it has to do with how kids learn to form syllables and speak and not their relative closeness to you. I wouldn’t worry too much about this.

    Post # 15
    3374 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: October 2011

    I just don’t get what’s wrong with saying “grandma”? My grandma tried to get me to call her “nana” when I was a kid, but even as a little kid I was too embarassed by that name to call her that.When I was 4, I told her that only babies can’t say “grandma”.

    DH’s grandma tried for “gaga” and he can’t stand saying that either. She still wants him to say Gaga, but he ends up just not calling her anything and not addressing her at all.

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