(Closed) Really down today, we’re cutting back on so much

posted 6 years ago in The Lounge
Post # 3
2239 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

Oh no!!! I’m sorry to hear this. I know there are some energy assistance programs in my area…are there any in yours that you could look into to get your heat on? As far as eating, you need to get food regardless of your husband’s pride.

Post # 4
635 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

@SimplyChic11:  I would seriously consider getting a job yourself if the money just isn’t working out. At the very least, talk to your husband. You have to be able to face this together.

Post # 5
13012 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

I’m so sorry!!  I think you  need to tell your husband that you haven’t been getting enough food, and the conditions are actually making you sick.  Something needs to be changed soon.  Hurt pride is a small issue when the flip side is you being healthy and fed.

Post # 6
3176 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

Yikes, can you work? It’s certainly not ideal but if you worked at a fast food restaurant or something you get a free meal a day :/ Otherwise, pride be damned and ask your parents for food. What does your husband have to say about all this?

Post # 7
428 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

I’m sorry things are so rough for you right now. I’m willing to bet he’d rather swallow his pride and get you some food than have you get seriously ill.

Post # 8
3520 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2012

I’m so sorry you are going through this; have you looked into assistance?  There are some relatively short-term options for people going through hard times.  Here is a link that might help:


I remember that you’re in school as well; can you apply for additional financial aid?

Post # 9
2104 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

I know there are outreach programs in my area that offer free food to ANYBODY. You don’t have to prove income or anything. They are there for people who need help.

Post # 10
4693 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

Oh honey, I’m sorry you’re going through this.  I’ve been where you are and it’s awful.  My SO was unemployed for 2 years and it was some of the hardest times of my life.  Call the town and find out about any energy assistance programs in your area to get your heat on, and if you have to go to a soup kitchen or a food pantry to eat that’s nothing to be ashamed of. Also I know it’s not ideal but we lived on rice and 25 cent boxes of mac n cheese for awhile.  You can get an 8 pack of cheap hot dogs for $1 too.  We could barely afford anything, our electricity was turned off more than once because I just didn’t have the money to pay the bill.  I took a second job at McDonald’s while my SO was still looking for work to make ends meet.  Also please talk to your husband about this.  We were able to get through this together, I can’t imagine going through it alone.

ETA: In most states you can dial 2-1-1 to find assistance programs you’re eligible for.

Post # 11
18643 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

Could you go to a food bank for some food?  I’m not sure where you live, but I know they have a program with my utility company to help people who can’t afford to heat their homes.  You need to get help from someone, you already have health problems that need attention, you don’t need to cause more.

Post # 12
385 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

Im a social worker and deal with linking people to services for food, energy assistance, housing, you name it. Check out local food banks, Food Sunday, the Rescue Mission, or Salvation Army. At least in my area, you are able to get a large food basket each month. It is stocked with canned goods, breads, pasta, juices, and seasonal veggies and fruits.

As far as electric, your state should provide a program for energy assistance. In Maryland its called MEAP. It helps with a large chunk of your bill. And you may want to consider budget billing. That way you arent paying a huge bill in the summer and winter. Instead, you pay the same amount year round.

Not sure what area you are in, but if its MD, feel free to PM me and I can give you more specific sources and numbers.  

Post # 13
2759 posts
Sugar bee

Definitely third the food bannk idea – I have a coworker who goes to one with her husband, and she says it’s so great. People donate all kinds of wonderful foods and it’s almost like grocery shopping. She and her husband would practically starve without it between his medical bills and their mortgage and other necessities.

God, that sucks so much. I’m so sorry, I can’t imagine what you’re going through but I can imagine how bad it must feel. It is definitely important to keep up your strength to stay healthy, so please consider food banks so you can get enough to eat.

As far as the heat goes, when I was in college our landlords controlled the heat which meant we barely got any ever (thermostat was broken, never fixed it). It got SO cold in our apartment with drafty windows and we turned to blankets, hats and gloves inside the house to help. You might be able to find a local Salvation Army store to stock up on fingerless gloves, extra bulky sweaters, maybe some thermal underwear to put on under your clothes which will help stave off the cold and keep your body warm.

Post # 14
6065 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: January 2012

I am so sorry. The bees above have already posted all the practical info to help and I don’t have much to add.

I just wanted to tell you how sorry I am and that my thoughts and prayers are with you.

Post # 15
3618 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

I am so sorry you are going through this. I agree with PPs that you need to talk to your Darling Husband about this. You guys are married and in this together. He needs to know the truth about how it’s affecting your health. There is no shame in asking for help.

Post # 16
116 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2008

Not to be snotty but is there any where in your budget you can cut the fat for extra cash?  TV, cell phones…..internet?

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