(Closed) Really need some advice here bee’s

posted 7 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
554 posts
Busy bee

Honestly- babies don’t usually come on time. Chances are neither she nor the baby will make it to your wedding. If she has had the baby she will be exhausted and bleeding and probably miserable. I would just relax and when its closer tell her you will miss her, but she should focus on feeling good and her new family. 

Post # 4
Member
1553 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

I understand the tension because of the backstory.  But I don’t think it should be a reason why you’d ask her not to bring her baby.   Because the baby will be a newborn, she likely won’t be comfortable being away from her for very long…especially if she is nursing.  And everyone who she would be likely to ask to watch her baby (her mother, her sister, etc) will be at the wedding anyway. 

I don’t think the baby being at the wedding will be any problem.  A newborn sleeps most of the time anyway and their cry isn’t as loud as an older baby’s.  Also, the baby will have plenty of relatives there who will fuss over her and be there to hold her while your Future Sister-In-Law is involved in wedding party activities.

Post # 5
Member
708 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: January 2011

I think you can definitely tell her you would prefer her to leave the baby at home or possibly provide a babysitter for her. Telling her that it isn’t safe for her baby and the loud music, etc is total BS. She is the mom and can decide what is right for her baby. If you don’t want the baby there, just tell her. Be prepared for her to be upset and think you are selfish (Which I do not).

Also, if she is only due 2 weeks before the wedding, it may be possible that she is not well enough to come or can only come for a short period of time. Birth can be a very tramatic experience on the body, and not everyone is up and walking around and wanting to smile in pictures a week or two after. If this were to happen, this does not make her selfish, it makes her a new mom.

Post # 8
Member
4137 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

i can’t imagine a mom leaving a 2 week old baby for a full day, if she’s even able.

Post # 9
Member
6661 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2010

One of my sister’s BM’s had a baby two weeks before her wedding. She was breastfeeding, so her IL’s actually took the baby from her right after a feeding before the ceremony then showed up midway through the reception for another feeding when the baby clearly couldn’t wait a minute longer. The Bridesmaid or Best Man and her Darling Husband had to leave the reception early, but other than that you wouldn’t have noticed anything was different – she came to get her hair done with us, rode in the limo, was present for all the pictures, and danced for a good part of the reception.

It was kind of crazy, but it worked. You really can’t expect a 2 week old to be separated from the mother all day, so they will be together either at your wedding or at home.

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