(Closed) REALLY need to vent about MIL

posted 8 years ago in Family
Post # 32
Member
1602 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

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@SweetartMD:  You described my stepmother to a T. She says things like that to me and my brother (also her step child) all the time. I used to get really offended until I figured out that she is just severely insecure about herself. Once I figured that out I was able to let the mean and offensive things she says roll off my shoulders (I was 13).

She tries harder now but still lacks a filter. I know she loves me and due to a strange turn of events I have decided to keep her in my life even though my father no longer is (they’re divorced now). She will know my future children and I will still celebrate the holidays with her. My Fiance has met her a few times and had to learn how to deal with her eccentric personality as well. As far as her own children go; her son barely speaks to her and her daughter only does so when she needs a babysitter or money. They love her too, but it is hard to be around her when she is so grating.

The things may sound harsh and rude because you are not used to them, but it might just require a tougher skin when she is around. I know my step-mom loves me, she just didn’t learn how to filter her thoughts and express her feelings in a ‘loving’ manner that I would know how to accept. Maybe that is the case with your Future Mother-In-Law as well? Maybe being extra sweet to her will help? Kind of a ‘kill ’em with kindess’ thing?

Post # 33
Member
858 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2018

Okay so you can’t be that mean.  You could give the gift back and be like “Oh I thought this was a cute little inside joke between us.”  You can also do the whole weight loss thing and act like you seriously think she use to weigh more than that.

Post # 35
Member
858 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2018

Best of luck.  The high road is never any fun when it comes to people like that.  When she upsets you you could buy an ugly stuffed animal, name it after her, and throw it at the wall everytime you are upset with her.

Post # 36
Member
520 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2014 - Italiano\'s Humble

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@MeelaMay:  OMG Hilarious! Horribly, horribly FRIKKIN HILARIOUS!!!

 

Op, I’m so sorry she’s like this. My bio-FMIL(fh’s real mom) is nonexistent in his life. we’re inviting her out of “being the bigger people” and “politics” LOL. My fh’s stepmom, however, I think I got lucky. She’s down to earth, and just as crazy redneck as I am, and it works LOL…

Just ignore what you can, chew pillows on some, and let your cousin handle the rest 🙂 LOL!

Post # 37
Member
1327 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2014

Instead of blocking her on facebook, you could just start ignoring her posts and when she asks just say that you’ve been busy and haven’t had time to play around online.  And then hide her from your newsfeed (she won’t know that you did).  You may not be able to keep her out of your life but at least you won’t have to see her online all the time.

Post # 38
Member
54 posts
Worker bee

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@Kit_Kath:  I agree. My experience with blocking people that are unstable is not good. I didn’t know the better ways to hide their feed and blocking exacerbated the situation.  She would rant on mutual friends pages.

Post # 39
Member
28 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: August 2014

Don’t you wish everyone could just get along? or at least pretend. haha 

Post # 40
Member
140 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: July 2018

@SweetartMD:  ooo yea i wouldn’t know what to do with someone like this. Keep your chin up! your DH loves you for you. dont let her get to you

The topic ‘REALLY need to vent about MIL’ is closed to new replies.

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