(Closed) Really need to VENT

posted 5 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
513 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

@Jen51287:  I think they are over reacting. Remember, this is your wedding not theirs. So you two make it however you want! ๐Ÿ™‚ I think we all have at least one person in our family that wants something different for our wedding. For me it’s my mom. She was persistent on us having a religious church wedding – we’re not. We’re getting married outside and it will not be one bit religious. Someone doesn’t like it? Too bad. It’s not their wedding. PLUS, you two are paying for it, not her. I’d just stop including her in the plans if she keeps that attitude. Just keep your chin up. ๐Ÿ™‚ By The Way, the ring bearer idea is adorable!! I haven’t heard of the love letter & wine box idea, but I love it! Great idea.

Post # 4
Member
488 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

I would say stop telling your mom your plans, if she’s just going to get upset about everything. Just tell her where to go and when, and if she has issues with anything at the wedding, hopefully she’ll know better than to spoil your day.

Post # 5
Member
9142 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 2013 - St. Augustine Beach, FL

I would stop discussing the wedding with family.  If they bring it up, I would smile and say you’ll see when you get there and then change the subject.

As for racist grandma, it’s so disappointing right?  Not that I want to rush the older generation to their grave or anything but damn the world will be a better place when that generation either gets a clue or checks out.

Post # 6
Member
110 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

@Jen51287: Your family is most certainly over-reacting. Your ideas above are SO cute and definitely say “modern”, “2013”, “NOT the dark ages” ๐Ÿ˜‰

Screw your family (no offence… I know you love them despite their crazyness). It’s your wedding. And you need to just keep on track and not let them guilt you into changing anything ๐Ÿ™‚

 

Post # 7
Member
7206 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2013

@Jen51287:  They are over reacting. I LOVE your plans and don’t find them THAT untraditional. If we were doing a ring bearer and flower girl I would have had them do something similar. I’m not sure if we’re even doing a unity candle (I’ve been look at other ideas) and we are having guests sign a picture book of our engagement photos. I don’t really understand what your family is so upset about. And the fact that your mom got upset about having black guests at your wedding is just abosulutely ridiculous.

I don’t think you are doing anything wrong at all (or planning a wedding that is even remotely circus like). I think it is nice that you are keeping your mom in the loop about what you are doing and that you considered her feelings when you decided not to elope. 

Post # 9
Member
604 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

I love that you are doing what YOU want instead of what everyone else wants…too many people cave to their guests or families so good for you!…I am also having non traditional things and my parents think I am nuts but have come around to my way of thinking and my Mum is now totally in to it all….give Gramma a Gravol before the ceremony and a nice blanket and maybe she will be good lol….good luck but dont let them bring you down!…Stop discussing it with them (I did that for a while)…and enjoy your day:)

Post # 10
Member
982 posts
Busy bee

@Jen51287:  I love your ideas! I’d never seen a ring bearer or flower girl like that before, I think it’s awesome! I don’t think it’s circus-like at all. I think your mum & grandmother are making all the issues – there is nothing wrong with your ideas. It’s YOUR wedding, and it should be how you want it to be. My sister copped grief from her Mother-In-Law over the stupidest things (‘you want to hire trestle tables?’), in the end she just had to say ‘this is our wedding and what we have decided on’. My parents took a bac seat with the planning and were always there to help and not to dictate. Please don’t be sad! It’s going to be your special day and it’s going to be fantastic!

Post # 12
Member
772 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

@Jen51287:  It always boggles my mind that people feel the need to put their two cents and get their panties in a twist over something that has nothing to do with them. 

Just stop talking wedding plans with any of them. 

Post # 13
Member
238 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2014

I agree, stop telling them YOUR plans that YOU are paying for! Even if you are throwing a circus, they have no say at all! I love your ideas so far, if you & Fiance like them, then that’s all that matters! Good luck & lots of hugs!

Post # 14
Member
1362 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2014

I have all of your ideas pinned!!!!! And I have ALWAYS wanted to do a wine box!!! Your wedding is not going to be a circus, it is going to be beautiful and modern and FUN. Next time they say something you can tell them, well if you dont like it you can simply not come so we dont inconvenience you. They told you you should elope well you can give them the option of uninviting them.

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