Post # 1
We’ve had a really rocky year (see previous cat thread if you need any examples). It’s strange since we used to be so close. But she’s changed… she’s such a nasty, bitter, and negative person now. Everything I say to her is met with a negative comment.
My friend is having a baby? “Ugh, she’s way too young. She should have an abortion. She just ruined her whole life”
HELLO?! Yes my friend is young but she’s already graduated from college, has a full-time job, and is in a great stable relationship. They were happy to discover her pregnancy and there was never any thought about not keeping it.
Even little things set her off. I mentioned that I was going to get my hair cut this week and she was like “Oh my god, I thought you were supposed to be SAVING money not blowing it.” Yeah…. I’m growing out a pixie cut and pretty much have a mullet right now, a hair cut is necessary, not to mention only $25.
We postponed our wedding back an entire year (from June 2012 to July 2013) and I honestly thought that would make her happy, she was saying we should wait another year ever since we got engaged. I told her the new date and all I got was “That’s way too soon, you should wait until 2014 or 2015 at least.” When I ask her why it’s too soon I recieve no reasonable answers just a “it’s just too soon.”
I’m really starting to hate talking to her, let alone being around her. No real point to posting this, just wanted to vent a little I guess.
Post # 3
@Gingersnap: I hate to ask this – but could it possibly be menopause? It’s caused my mom to be pretty nutso. She flies off the handle about everything.
Surely it’s not a good excuse, but it could explain it. I can’t believe she said that about your friend 🙁 so sorry.
I am totally in your boat about trying to please your mom about your wedding – we changed our date basically because of her.
(((hugs))) I hope this passes!
Post # 4
@napabridekelsey: Actually, I never thought of that… that would explain so much. She’s a little young for it but it’s not out of the realm of possibility. And it explains the sudden-ness of it all.
Post # 5
lol I dont think she is a nasty bitter person I just think she is going throug a negative phase,
Post # 6
@Gingersnap: Some people go through it in their thirties fyi >.> So it could be totally plausible.
I feel you on the mom flying off the handle thing. I think weddings instantly make mothers take a nosedive off the sanity express. Perhaps it makes them think of how close they are to dying? I would say we all sort of fear our mortality–some more than others.
Post # 7
Honey, my mother has been that was since the day I was born. Father, too, as a matter of fact. I’m not trying to be harsh but be thankful for when you were close. Maybe she’s going through something she hasn’t shared with you yet. You can’t be responsible for other people’s reactions to things and let them make you feel bad. If she wants to be a party pooper, that’s her deal. Sorry you’re dealing with that I guess I’m a little hardened to it cuz I’ve dealt with it forever. I hope it gets better.
Post # 8
@Gingersnap: I dont think she can deal with you getting married (the too soon comment kinda triggered me a bit here).
Some mother’s are like that, my sister’s friend’s mom totally did everything in her power to sabotage her friend’s wedding as well as her relations with in laws..all because she felt like her daughter shouldnt be getting married. Period.
There usually isnt reasoning for these cases…Im just glad she isnt that nutty though.
Or it could be a menopause thing. I really hope its menopause and its temporary.
Post # 9
That bites, Ginger. 🙁
I realized a couple years ago that my mom stopped being my mom and started just seeing me as another person… does that make sense? All of a sudden, she’s complaining about my dad as if I’m her buddy… I’m not sure I like this either!