- 7 years ago
- Wedding: January 2012
I’ve had an amazing relationship with my in laws from day 1, but that’s pretty much all gone now.
It’s because of the wedding planning and our differing expectations, and
their need to control things.
We wanted an intimate non religious wedding (he is atheist, I’m agnostic), they wanted a catholic service and to invite their 150 closest acquaintances.
After a lot of emotional blackmail on their part, we agreed to it, because we really valued the lifelong relationship over one day. This wasn’t enough for them though, they wanted to butt in abt everything. I was always nice and polite and would tell them I’d think abt it.
All the suggestions abt small things came from Future Mother-In-Law, and Future Father-In-Law would brush things off.
Turned out he was a passive aggressive (insert choice word here), and was letting all this anger and resentment build up, till one day, he decided to write a 6 page letter to my parents abt his various gripes. His letter was full of lies, and portrayed
him in an angelic light, and Fiance and me
as evil uncaring emotionless people.
Fiance and I were appalled by this, and told him that since none of our compromises were good enough for him, we were going to stop compromising completely, and just have our dream wedding.
Future Mother-In-Law stepped in, told us Future Father-In-Law
wouldn’t come to the wedding if his
hordes of acquaintances weren’t invited. We ended up softening, and giving in to their wishes, though we were both still angry.
Fiance ended up getting over it all before me, and in a bid to repair the relationship, I put it all behind me too.
Or at least I tried to. Despite everything that has happened, Future Mother-In-Law is still trying to have a say, and I’ve reached the end of my rope. I’m also very worried abt what shit they will pull on the day itself. This fear is based not just on their ridiculous behaviour so far, but the stories I’ve heard abt what they did at their other son’s wedding.
I’m just so sick of feeling angry towards them, with no outlet or resolution.
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