Post # 1
Sorry, nothing to do with weddings, but I thought I might get some help.
I am trying to avoid the news because I find it so disturbing. The murder of the American journalists, as well as the killing of others by ISIS. But going through the grocery line, a couple of times I caught a glimpse of a rather graphic image in the tabloid newspaper (pertaining to the two journalists). I look away, but I can’t get it out of mind. Really disturbed by these horrific killings.
Feel kind of vulnerable admitting to such strong emotion, so I hope I don’t get attacked, and I hope this does not turn into a political debate.
Anyone have any advice as to how to deal with these emotions? I can’t do much about what is happening. Just try to make my own small corner of the world brighter, I suppose. Perhaps a random act of kindness to try to counter this cruelty?
Posting this in Christian, but anyone is welcome to respond.
Post # 2
I recently saw a video (started it not knowing what it would be) and it stuck with me. I felt very helpless, because it’s only by luck that I was born in an area where I’ve never worried about bombs and terrorists in my backyard. September 11th was close (Jersey girl here) but I was a child, so I didn’t really grasp the enormity of it until much later. It’s also scary to think that it’s really possible that I will live in an area like that someday, somewhere. It’s out of my control. I think senseless murder makes us all feel vulnerable in some way. Like, if a drug dealer is shot, we can tell ourselves, “they were doing something dangerous, and I’m safe if I don’t do that.” But the murder I saw was just a person on the street, a young woman doing nothing to invite death. That makes it harder, because we hate to think that innocent people can be taken like that, and it’s unsettling to know that they can. I don’t follow politics much, but I have the unrealistic ideal of no more war and killing. Too many people are hurting, and I believe God is like a father watching two of His children fight-He’s not on a side, He just wants to see the violence and fighting end, and for His peace to win out.
Post # 3
- Wedding: March 2014 - A castle
The Malaysian Airlines Flight crash in the Ukraine really stuck with me. I was on reddit when it happened and people were posting images of the bodies… even babies. That whole entire week I was just aloof and depressed. People say how bad our world is getting, but by comparison to past wars and whatnot I think it is actually getting much better. I guess I’m just thankful that it’s not happening close to home? Be thankful that no one you know is currently involved, and I think random acts of kindness is a great idea! Maybe you could start getting more proactive about local injustices and start rallying for a cause close to your heart.
Post # 4
- Wedding: Royal Park Hotel
Carolsays: I’m also terrified by ISIS and what they’re doing and how, seemingly, powerful they are getting. Hopefully it’s all smoke and mirrors on their end and I suspect it might be.
I’m worried they will target areas around Detroit, like Dearborn, MI because they have such a large muslim population (the largest in the United States) and I have a lot of family there. Just a few Christmases ago there was a man that tried to blow up a plane while it was landing in Detroit. I believe he had extremist ideals and targeted Detroit for that reason.
I live in NYC so I know it’s just a countdown until some lunatic tries to pull another mass murder stunt. It’s very very upsetting. Hopefully the USA and other countries can take care of those monsters.
Post # 5
- Wedding: Royal Park Hotel
I mean – people think something like the Holocaust could never happen again but I think it could. Scary, scary stuff.
Post # 6
Derp: A Holocaust occurred in Cambodia. Led by Pol Pot. What ISIS is doing reminds me of Pol Pot. ISIS is publicizing what they are doing, while it took time for word to get out of what was happening in Cambodia. And some people didn’t believe it right away. No reason to doubt ISIS because they are filming it.
Post # 7
I don’t have any advice but I completely understand. People are often surprised and sometimes put off by the fact that I know very little about what is going on. It’s not at all that I don’t care. It’s that I can’t handle it. I am an extremely sensitive person and I’m also very empathetic by nature. I have an extremely difficult time processing such horrific events.
Post # 8
just_another_dandelion: Yeah, I have had to back away from the news for the same reason.
Post # 9
It bothers me, too. Something that helps me is not watching television. I get my news from the radio and the New York Times. I try not to look at tabloids when I pass them. I would never condone willful ignorance — I want to know what’s going on in the world — but I absolutely reject lurid, unnecessary details and images.
Post # 10
Carolsays: What your feeling is totally normal and the only that that will help those feelings subside is time (from my experience).
I am from the NJ/NYC area and was a complete zombie during 9/11/01 for weeks – months. The whole country was shattered, but there was nothing like being in the thick of it. I remember every detail of that day as if it were yesterday, as we approach the anniversary next week. It was an indescribable feeling of uneasiness. I was afraid of leaving my house. I was kept awake with nightmares of what might “happen next”. I still can’t hear Lee Greenwood’s “God Bless the USA” without getting emotional. There was even a sense of solidarity with the person next to you at a red light. It was the bizarro world.
But like everything, those feelings eventually passed. I’m still haunted around this time each year as there are a lot of memorials that take place. I’m always touched/saddened at the families on TV reading the names of their lost loved ones, especially the children that read off the names of their parents and how they’re literally grown up on TV before my eyes.
It’s jarring and disturbing. If you weren’t effected by it, that would be odd.
Post # 11
Carolsays: totally normal. The murders have horrified me and I wish something was being done about it. X
Post # 12
I too am trying to avoid the images of horrible things.
When the Malaysian airline was shot down over Ukraine- it hit really close to home. A family member has a friend whose sister was on that flight. The images coming in of bodies and luggage being sacked just broke my heart. That could be this lady’s sister and I could not imagine seeing something like that. The pictures of the trains with the bodies loaded on them was really too much to see. Her body could be in there just waiting to come home.
Just a long process for those grieving- all they wanted was their loved ones back.
The whole situation just reminded me to be more respectful for events like this. Someone somewhere had just lost someone they loved.
Post # 13
I have 2 kids and I worry for their futures often- will the world be a dangerous place for them? But I have to remind myself that the vast majority of people are good- I really believe that. And I don’t want to live my life cowering in fear.
Post # 14
Carolsays: It can be pretty hard to do, though, where everything is on social media.
stillme: I struggle with finding the line between willfull ignorance and limiting details.
Post # 15
Carolsays: I am mom to 4 adult DDs so I am going to put my soothing mom voice on here. Please know that I do not mean to patronize whatsoever – I hope to help.
I remember when 9-11 happened. I was in the military and watched it live on TV. My 2 oldest DDs lived in apartments within about 5-20 minutes from my office. I remember being knocked off my rocker when it happened and having a 19 yo Dirty Delete call me scared to death.
Remember, first and foremost you ARE safe. Also, as a Christian, take this to God and ask him to help you push your fears away so that your thinking and judgement are clear and you can see things as they are. When I am overcome by fear I can’t make decent decisions so I try to keep it at bay when I have to think things through.
I was living in Michigan during 9-11 (still do!) and working less than 2 hours from the biggest Muslim community in the US. At the time everyone went into a fear of Muslims and they were all radicals, etc. From that day forward, I never went to work or left work in my uniform – I wore civvies each way in the car, and I ditched my military license plate so I couldn’t be identified as military to a passerby. I also had a 5 yo son at home so I refused to have my uniform on when he was with me. It was overkill but no one had a clue what was going on at the time. I was making the decisions that I thought kept my family and me the safest.
Next – turn off the news and don’t look at the news on the internet. President Obama held a news conference today regarding actions Nato is considering. I am sure ISIL isn’t going to take that well and will make some kind of statement. They aren’t going to go away on their own, and I really think they will behead others as they have the journalists. That is NOT in your control, or mine. Just stay away from the news, keep your eyes off the newsstands if it becomes a problem.
I understand that you feel vulnerable and this has kind of shocked you. I think many of us feel that way. I think getting busy with LOTS of random acts of kindness will do you a world of good. It will remind you of the love and kindness that exists in the world and that is much bigger than ISIS terror. They will not prevail in the end, but it will most likely get worse before it gets better.
Spend your time investing in those people around you who could use some kindness. It will readjust your thinking and make you feel better. Oh, and don’t forget to pray! My best wishes to you.