(Closed) Really Upset Right Now!

posted 8 months ago in Relationships
  • poll:
    leave him! : (11 votes)
    21 %
    work it out, but beware of her! : (11 votes)
    21 %
    you big baby! grow up! : (30 votes)
    58 %
  • Post # 31
    Member
    5567 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: October 2017

    ravenslair2018 :  I have gad, panic disorder, and cptsd, I’ve been in treatment (meds and therapy) for about a decade on and off. I’ve been back in therapy for about two years now

    I got sick and tired of the “this is me, my life was hard, my childhood sucked, so you need to just deal with it because my life has been so hard”, and I got help so that I could live a healthy life and be a positive asset to the people in my life

    Post # 32
    Member
    10020 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: September 2012

    ravenslair2018 :  My advice is take your power back. 

    You’re letting her win every single time you have yet another immature meltdown over something she does.  Even if you do care so extremely much about something she says or does, try at least pretending that you don’t care at all, unless you’re fine with your mother-in-law loving every minute of how much she can emotionally torture you.  She’s probably really enjoying it.  

    Keep your dignity, I always say.  In your case, get some dignity.

    Post # 33
    Member
    1450 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: March 2021 - Kauai, HI

    My SO visits his parents every other weekend sat morning until Sunday night.  It’s not favorite, but it’s important to him so it’s important to me.  I’ve learned to like the alone time.  But… they don’t hate me.  

    I think you should let him have his time with her.  I would be wary about her poisoning him against you but if you’re married that probably won’t be effective as she’s probably been trying to do that all along!  I’d act like I didn’t care so she didn’t feel like she was winning.  Use the time to work on yourself and don’t let her have any sort of power. 

    Post # 35
    Member
    659 posts
    Busy bee

    ravenslair2018 :  You asked for advice, no one is bullying you. We are pointing out valid points as well as giving our point of view. That’s what you get when you post on a public forum. Don’t like it, then don’t post.

    Post # 36
    Member
    5567 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: October 2017

    ravenslair2018 :  this sounds like something my 18 year old sister would write 

    If you are that young (you mention 20 years of abuse, so maybe you are 20?) then I understand your need to grow and mature

    Post # 37
    Member
    1891 posts
    Buzzing bee

    Go post your question on DWIL nation. They can help you better than we can. ravenslair2018 :  

    Post # 38
    Member
    1053 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: May 2019

    You deliberately made one of the options in your own poll “you big baby, grow up”.  Inviting people to offer you honest and unsugarcoated advice to a problem you are bringing up and then accusing them of bullying you is deeply manipulative.  So is taking off your rings and threatening to leave when you don’t get your way.  This is a pattern of behavior you really need to recognize and address if you want any relationship to work

    Post # 39
    Member
    939 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: September 2017

    ravenslair2018 :  Despite her not liking you, and while I do understand that is rough I think you do need to recognize that happens alot more often than you think. I think you need to let him have his own relationship with her. 

    Not allowing him to see his own mom really is controlling I am sure when you cool down you will see that. Maybe just tell him not to tell you when he goes so it doesnt get you riled up and upset?

    Post # 40
    Hostess
    8525 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: Dorset, UK

    I’m going to go ahead and close this now. 

    The topic ‘Really Upset Right Now!’ is closed to new replies.

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