(Closed) Reasons I am happy that I am not TTC (yet)

posted 5 years ago in TTC
Post # 16
Member
9135 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 2013 - St. Augustine Beach, FL

MissGeeBee:  I agree about booking last minute trips!  We decided to take a long weekend to Savannah and Atlanta.  All we had to worry about was making sure I got the approved time off from work.

We are also planning a two week trip to Europe in the fall.  We definitely don’t want me to be pregnant for that because it involves a lot of walking and I don’t know how bad my morning sickness will be (it tends to be really bad in my family).  I am also planning my first girls trip since college.  It’s a four day trip to Nashville for the Country Music Festival.  One of my bucket list items!

Sleeping in and naps are big ones.  Most of the kids I know are up and moving by 6 or 7am everyday, even weekends.  I hope my husband agrees to take turns once we do have a kid because I will really miss being able to sleep in.  Then they are awful sometimes at naptime because they’re so exhausted they fight going to sleep.  I am not looking forward to those days!

I’ll add that it’s nice to have cookies and ice cream for dinner when I don’t feel like cooking.  Doing that to a kid just screams neglect to me though because they don’t know any better and it’s encouraging bad eating habits.  Plus, I want us to sit down for family dinners most if not every night.

Post # 17
Member
9172 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2013

we’ve been ttcing for some time with no luck yet, not to put a damper (and this is all my opinion and experience) but nothing is really that hard with a baby as long as you are flexible.

<br />1. Booking last minute trips – well maybe distance, like a trip to hawaii, but my mom took me and then me and my brother everywhere when we were babies.  we were never home.  my mom was a Stay-At-Home Mom, so a trip to DC for the day, no problem.  deciding to visit the grandparents in upstate NY for a 5 hour car drive, we loved it and slept in the car, that was where i napped.  my mom said i only cried when we pulled in the driveway because going home meant we had to go to bed.

2.  Sleeping in etc.  My parents were night owls and they didn’t want a baby waking them up at the crack of dawn, so my sleep schedule was being put to bed after the late show was over.  i slept through the night early on.  then if i did wake up early, my mom just brought me in bed with her, before this was a thing, and i went back to sleep. 

<br />3. Naps – don’t take them anyway.

<br />4. Saving money – not really an issue for me. 

5. Feeling proud of my career and establishing myself – i don’t know how old you are, but i have a bachelors and a masters degree and i am already established in my career, so i am proud of my accomplishment.

 <br />6. Time for hobbies- there will always be time for this.  i joked with my mom about the kids always spending friday nights at grandmoms so i can go cycling and running on saturdays without worrying about the kids. 

 <br />7. Enjoying being somewhat fit. – well i am a triathlete and i know a lot of moms, new and old who had no problems keeping fit during and after pregnancy. my gym offers a free daycare while you workout as part of the membership and i know many gyms do as well. i know a mom with a 6 months old who started training for an ironman.  it is just a matter of priorities and time management.

 

all that being said, this came up recently.  Darling Husband and I were headed out to dinner, about 10 minutes into our car trip, i suggested another place 45 minutes away instead of 15.  when we told DH’s friend about the new place we tried,  DH’s friend said once you have kids, you can’t do that.  I said, what go out to dinner?  She said no, be spontanous and change your plan.  I didn’t see the problem.  If I was already headed out to dinner with the kid(s) what difference would it make where we went. (and both places were completely kid friendly)

Post # 19
Member
390 posts
Helper bee

MissGeeBee:  Fiance and I were JUST talking about this! We want kids someday but are really intentionally enjoying being child-free right now. Here’s my list:

1. Spontaneity: Fiance and I are both pretty busy with school, internship, work, etc. When we have unexpected free time we love last minute, spur of the moment fun time without figuring out logistics or planning around anything else.

2. Self growth: We have a lot of hobbies and are really into wellness and personal development. We enjoy being able  to nurture and grow into our best selves without being totally responsible for another human being.

3. Saving money: We are able to save a good portion of our income and are also building a healthy portfolio. We’re both “boot-strappers” and it feels really awesome to be building a solid financial future. We will of course keep saving and investing when we have kids but right now it’s great to do that without the additional expense of having a child.

4. International travel: Fiance and I are both from immigrant families and are way into traveling. We usually spend the first half in a hostel and the second half somewhere luxe. While travel is always possible, everything we do isn’t baby or kid friendly and it’s great to not have to think about that right now. 

Post # 20
Member
5219 posts
Bee Keeper

Everything everyone already mentioned about time, travel and hobbies. Plus the fact that we really, really like just eating oreos and drinking beer for dinner sometimes. The thought of preparing meals for a family every night is something we will need to ease into.  I like to cook, but some nights we just don’t feel like the fuss of dinner and eat Ramen and drink wine– it’s pathetic haha.

Post # 21
Member
1066 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

I am only young (22) and not married to Fiance yet, but it feels like everyones popping out babies and I feel kind of left out.  FI also has hardcore baby fever and anytime we are discussing our goals over the next couple of years it’s “we do this and this and this… so we can starting making a baby!” Gah I just want a mini us so bad some times 🙂

Realistically, I see mums my age struggling sooo much financially and they will be for the rest of their lives as they weren’t set up when they had kids.  I really want to have bought a house and be established in our careers first, which if all goes to plan will be in the next 3 years.  OH! I also want to be married first haha.

We are going to have some issues conceiving due to my PCOS and thyroid issues and his job gives him a temporary low sperm count (due to heat) so we have decided to stop BC after our wedding and just relax and see what happens.  It’s unlikely anything will happen anyway without some form of medical assistance.  If we did suprisingly get pregnant in that period we would be okay, and if we don’t upon entering our “ideal period” then we have already done the 12 month wait before getting medical intervention and let my hormones stabilise off the pill.

 

Post # 22
Member
459 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2016

We would really like to wait three to five years after our wedding to have kids. I am the kind of person who doesn’t want to rush through any part of my life. We’re having a long engagement because I want to enjoy this time. I want to enjoy several years with my husband before we bring more family members into the picture. I think it is just special to enjoy this time together, because everything changes after you have kids! I can understand couples who have them right away for sure.

Post # 23
Member
2091 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

I have not heard any reason that I can really disagree with! I am a mom already. I just want to let you bees know that your life will not be over or lacking after you have kids. In the beginning certain things will be postponed. Eventually, you will get into a routine and things will run smoothly. Things get better as far as logistics and time when the kids are older. My son is in kindergarten and he is a dream now, haha! We can travel with or without him and he is really a lot of fun. His communication skills are amazing now! There is light at the end of the tunnel… In the meantime, enjoy being as spontaneous as possible!!!

Post # 24
Member
1088 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

Let’s see-

Being able to go away for the weekend and only have to board the dog (our closest family is 4 hours away, no easy babysitters).

Not a big drinker, but I love my caffinated teas!!  Would want to scale those back, that’ll be hard.

Not sleeping in, or taking turns.  Have to get used to that!

Taking baby everywhere (You can’t just leave them at home?  Who knew)

New car needed, ours is a coup, and a pain to get to the backseats, let alone, bad for carseats. 

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