Post # 1
Maybe I’m mistaken.. but I was always taught that even if takes months, you MUST hand-write a thank you letter to each guest. It doesn’t have to be long, but it should show your appreciation.
I attended a wedding in November for a girl I honestly don’t know, at all. The “thank you” letter I received, was a card with photos on the front and back and the words “thank you” printed very small on the front. …really?
I’m pretty sure my mother would crucify me and make me return every gift if I did that.
(Oh, and she had the nerve to message me on facebook to ask me when our wedding is so she can call off… I NEVER TOLD HER SHE WAS INVITED. I guess I have to now….)
Can anyone suggest a nice way to tell her she isn’t invited? Even though I already told her the dates..
Post # 3
- Wedding: January 2013 - Harbourfront Grand Hall
@OnceUponATime: OMG I’ve gotten the same thing, completely unacceptable!
And no, don’t invite that girl to your wedding!!
Post # 4
I already responded though! My Future Mother-In-Law said “it’s only 2 more people” … but it’s $90/plate! I don’t know what to do. Fiance doesn’t want them there either.
Post # 5
Photo cards are cute, but yes they should include a handwritten note as well.
Post # 6
The thank you cards don’t bother me in the slightest. The assumption that she would be invited to my wedding is what would piss me off.
Post # 7
I recently got one of these thank yous too.I wasnt impressed since the wedding was in July and the not at all personalized post card was recieved in January. …. I vow to do better for my guests!
Post # 8
Definately do not invite her! Her assuming she would be invited to the wedding would make me so mad!
Post # 9
- Wedding: May 2013 - Walt Disney World
I agree she should have written something a bit more than a simple “thank you” but if you don’t know her at all, maybe she was struggling with what to write, idk…how do you know her, btw, that you were invited? Is she or her husband FI’s friend or something? Just wondering…
She should not automatically assume she is invited to your wedding either. You have no obligation to invite her. I wouldn’t worry about it, since you don’t really know her anyway.
Post # 10
Yup, I get SO PISSED when I get these. Lazy asses.
Post # 11
Ugh! I hate the invitation assumption! I am totally deleting my facebook account in the next two months!
And I know what you mean about a hand written note… At least a signature or a thanks would be nice, but I’m learning that a lot of people don’t know that! Maybe she’s one of them.
Post # 12
Well.. I’m originally from Northern Europe and before joining the Bee, I had absolutely no idea that you’re supposed to write handwritten thank you-notes. I am used to general thank you-notes and actually find “thank you for the beautiful towel”-kind-of-notes creepy… Much more pressure on gift-giving, IMO.
Post # 13
It made me furious! Glad I’m not alone.
I’m not really sure who she is. She related distantly. Something like his grandmother’s neice’s daughter.. idk. The generation above us knows her, but we don’t.
Is there a nice way to tell her she isn’t invited after already responded via facebook?
I was thinking something like “I responded too quickly as we hadn’t yet worked out the official guestlist. Unfortunately, our guestlist grew way to quickly and we had to make a few eliminations due to budgeting reasons.”
Post # 14
- Wedding: May 2014 - Paradise Gardens
+1- very lazy!
I was upset when the same thing happened to me after a babyshower. And I’m not going to lie, I still have a problem with it. It kinda makes me feel like “they better not expect one more gift from us” becuase our 1st three weren’t very appreciated (in my opinion).
Post # 15
ooh, interesting! I’m always fascinated to learn other culture’s customs.
Post # 16
I would be upset too. Some people really need a refresher course on etiquette. We got a thank you card once for a wedding we attended and it included marriage advice. Really? Because after being married for 2 months you’re now an expert? I was totally appalled and tossed the card in the trash immediately after showing DH who just laughed and rolled his eyes.