(Closed) Received a totally unpersonalized "thank you" card. (rant)

posted 8 years ago in Paper
  • poll: My thank your cards are (were):

    personalized, hand written letters/cards

    generic photos

  • Post # 17
    Member
    1709 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: May 2013 - Walt Disney World

    View original reply
    @OnceUponATime:  Oh, okay, I was just curious, lol.

    Hmm, what to say…I honestly don’t know.  Your response could work, but I’ve heard that using the budget as an excuse for not inviting somone may cause some to say that they will pay their way or something like that, so you might still get caught up in that tight spot.  Maybe you could say something about the capacity of the venue or something?

    Post # 18
    Member
    5540 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: December 2011

    I think while yes she could have written a personal thank you note at the same time, life gets crazy and I don’t feel like the “dear xx thank you for the yyy we really love it and can’t wait to use it for such and such” form letter that most thank you notes are means that much more. I gave a gift because I wanted to. Not because I expected something in return. 

    As for the assuming about an invite, I do think that is kind of rude and you just say something along the lines of “sorry I spoke too soon and we have discovered we are going to have to limit the wedding to close family and friends”. 

    Post # 19
    Member
    6014 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: March 2012

    I’ve received several of the photo thank you cards and they all had hand written expressions of thanks on the back.  It literally takes about as long as it did to open my gift, to write a small note of appreciation FOR my gift…. considering I had to go to the store and select the gift also.

    I would tell her that after running the numbers and that gosh darn venue being so darn TIGHT with the numbers, you can’t invite everyone you wish you could have.

    Post # 20
    Member
    732 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: August 2013

    They deffinatly should have been a personalized note, i wouldnt have sent them out like that..I did want to use photos for ours, but theyre going to be more like post cards so i can write a nice note on the back, i think people will like them!

    Post # 23
    Member
    732 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: August 2013

    View original reply
    @OnceUponATime:  Thanks! I just have to find out where to get them made, which will be the tricky part ;p I was initially going to do that for the save the dates, but we didnt end up doing save the dates since the wedding is so small, but i still want to utilize the idea! no better way than for the thank you cards haha

    Post # 24
    Member
    6262 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: August 2013 - The Liberty House

    View original reply
    @chasesgirl:  +1 on the response- I think that saying you had to make some eliminations implies that she was on there in the first place, so you don’t want to say that. Telling her that you are only having close family and friends is good, though

    Post # 25
    Member
    684 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    That would seriously irk me! I think it looks insincere to say the least. I handwrote and personalized all of our thank you cards (140 to be exact) and sent them out two weeks after we came back from our honeymoon. Under a month from our wedding date. I am one of those people who once I start something I need to finish it. I couldn’t do 10 cards and walk away, this resulted in some serious wrist pain lol

    Post # 26
    Member
    1652 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: July 2011

    Ugh I hate those thank you photo cards – they are really impersonal and cheap.

    We did proper cards with a photo inside and hand-written notes specific to each person and thanking them for the item/s we received. I really enjoyed writing them too and spent ages over them.

     

    Post # 28
    Member
    476 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: January 2013

    Ha!  That’s so odd– is there any chance at all that she’s just etiquette-challenged? Or maybe, with everyone doing photo Christmas cards, she decided she’d follow suit with a photo Thank You?

    I hand-addressed every invitation, I have hand-written every thank-you note so far, and will continue to do so after the wedding with any cards I have to send later. It’s just what you do.

    Post # 29
    Member
    3355 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: May 2012

    I would be happy with a handwritten THANKS! and a signature and nothing more, but not even that!? PSH! People assuming they were going to be invited was the sole reason why I didn’t tell anybody I was even engaged.

    Post # 30
    Member
    10635 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: January 2011

    We did photo thank-you cards with a handwritten note.

    I don’t have a problem if it’s not handwritten.  I don’t know why this is proper etiquette, as it excludes those with certain disabilities.  As long as a thank-you is personalized, I don’t care if it’s handwritten or sent through a printer.

    Post # 31
    Member
    1863 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: August 2012

    All of ours were handwritten.  We got married in August and I had them ALL (150ish) done and mailed by October.  I wanted people to know that we appreciated what they did for us and honestly, I like getting handwritten letters/cards!  I know 1/2 our guests do to and we got a bunch of comments on how thoughtful it was to send handwritten notes.  

    As fas as the assumed invite, I had someone post on my FB wall about wondering when the wedding was for planning purposes. I messaged them back and told them that while we had wanted to do a big wedding with lots of friends, because of our timeline, we had to keep it to more of a family wedding and we were not able to invite as many friends as we had hoped.  

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