Received invite with only FI's name on envelope?

posted 3 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 62
Member
111 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: November 2017

Definitely contact and clarify! She messed up.

Post # 63
Member
379 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2017

Sephiroth :  Hole rudeness batman…

Um no. If I don’t know you, there is literally ZERO reason why I have to invite you to my wedding. No, there is no guest list etiquette about inviting “social units” because we don’t live in 1950 anymore. If i dont want to spend all that money on someone i font know, thats my prerogative. They are not married yet, and if the second cousin who she doesn’t even know doesn’t want to invite her, too damn bad. I only invited people I know directly to my wedding. If I had all of their SO’s come too my guest list would have gone from 40 to 80, and that’s absurd. Should I only have invited 20 to accommodate 20 people I don’t know? Hell no.

Some Bees on here need to just chill out and remember that not everyone’s idea of a wedding means fancy China, 300 guests and unlimited budgets. 

This bride seems very laid back about her whole day, and guess what, that’s okay!

Post # 64
Member
295 posts
Helper bee

NDTieTheKnot :  I know this thread is a few weeks old, but I read through it and I am sorry, I have to disagree. If a couple is in a serious relationship and of course if they are married, both parties should be invited. You are a ‘social unit’. It may sound old fashioned, but thats just the way it is. If you don’t/wouldn’t find it offensive if somone sent your spouse an invitation and did not include you, then more power to you, good for you.

Perhaps this thread stuck out to me because I just declined a shower and wedding invitation for ‘etiquette’ reasons. The shower invitation was addressed to me using my maiden name. This girl knows I’m married because she came to my wedding…7 YEARS AGO. She knows my last name…I even spelled it out for her on FB when she messaged me for my address. The shower invitation told me I had to RSVP to ‘gauranty’ entry and that there would be no ‘guest substitutions, invitation only’. Kind of like how she chose not to bring her boyfriend to my wedding (he was on the invitation) and instead brought her cousin…neither even gave a card. But I digress.

The wedding invitation was made out to me (again, my maiden name) & Guest. I’m sorry, maybe I am ‘old fashioned’, but when I did my invitations, I made sure to have every guests’ name, correct spelling, and name of their spouse/mate/whoever. Especially for people who were ‘social units’, I made sure they were probably addressed on everything from Save-The-Date Cards to the seating chart. 

It may seem petty, and maybe I just needed to get that rant out. But it seems as if some people are just plain lazy and don’t do the leg work to make sure that things are done properly. And the excuse normally is that it’s ‘old fashioned’. No, it’s just the right thing to do.

Post # 65
Member
295 posts
Helper bee


NDTieTheKnot :
  I know this thread is a few weeks old, but I read through it and I am sorry, I have to disagree. If a couple is in a serious relationship and of course if they are married, both parties should be invited. You are a ‘social unit’. It may sound old fashioned, but thats just the way it is. If you don’t/wouldn’t find it offensive if somone sent your spouse an invitation and did not include you, then more power to you, good for you.

Perhaps this thread stuck out to me because I just declined a shower and wedding invitation for ‘etiquette’ reasons. The shower invitation was addressed to me using my maiden name. This girl knows I’m married because she came to my wedding…7 YEARS AGO. She knows my last name…I even spelled it out for her on FB when she messaged me for my address. The shower invitation told me I had to RSVP to ‘gauranty’ entry and that there would be no ‘guest substitutions, invitation only’. Kind of like how she chose not to bring her boyfriend to my wedding (he was on the invitation) and instead brought her cousin…neither even gave a card. But I digress.

The wedding invitation was made out to me (again, my maiden name) & Guest. I’m sorry, maybe I am ‘old fashioned’, but when I did my invitations, I made sure to have every guests’ name, correct spelling, and name of their spouse/mate/whoever. Especially for people who were ‘social units’, I made sure they were probably addressed on everything from Save-The-Date Cards to the seating chart. 

It may seem petty, and maybe I just needed to get that rant out. But it seems as if some people are just plain lazy and don’t do the leg work to make sure that things are done properly. And the excuse normally is that it’s ‘old fashioned’. No, it’s just the right thing to do.

Post # 66
Member
102 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2017

I would ask.  I have a distant cousin who i have not spoken to in probably 5 years but i am being told i have to invite her.  She just recently got engaged to someone who I have never met and I am not inviting to my wedding.  It is just her and her parents.

Post # 67
Member
302 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2017

emsie :  Sounds like only your fiance was invited which is pretty rude. Send back the RSVP with just his name and reply NO. My fiance was invited to a wedding without me when we had been dating for a number of years and he responded no because of it.

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