receiving a wedding invitation *after* the rsvp deadline?

posted 6 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
61 posts
Worker bee

@lilchicana:  this happened to us. We did as you did ..sesent it right away and contacted them. Planning a wedding is stressful.  So ifwe we were b listed or they forgot bout us, it is ok. We joke that we were b listed to lol.

Post # 4
2055 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

We had a 3 invitations out of 150 get kicked back to us for lack of postage!! So we had to put those in a new envelope and resend them.  Those guests got their invitations probably the same day as the RSVP deadline.  So maybe that happened??

Post # 5
396 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

sounds like the groom kept forgetting to drop off the invite and the bride finally just stuck it in the mail after finding it wedged somewhere in his car 😉

Post # 6
222 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

@MmeVT:  hahah yesssss exactly!

Post # 7
668 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

Sounds like you were B listed….

This is why B Lists are rude.


Post # 8
1696 posts
Bumble bee

Did you check the cancellation date? I have one frequent guest whose invitations go astray about fifty percent of the time. Sometimes they get returned to me as “no such address”, sometimes they get delivered to her a week or two after my dinner or tea. Yet, the other half of the time they go straight to her mailbox with no problem.

I had a large garden party some time ago where the majority of guests received their invitations in four days, and a small number of guests did not receive them for three weeks. I had one envelope (an invoiced payment, and not an insignificant one!) that took three months to get to me, with my client calling every two weeks to find out why the cheque had not been cashed yet. And one “express post” envelope that the nice lady at the post office put on the back of the counter so that it wouldn’t get mixed into the regular mail — and then forgot about for four days!

God bless Canada Post, because I am certainly not going to do so!

Post # 9
62 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: May 2013


When I saw the title, I thought they were B listed, but it seems like the couple was inviting them the entire time…verbally inviting them and such. 

I know I didn’t let my FH have anything to do with delivering invites. He thought I was crazy for mailing all the invites. He wanted to hand deliver some, but they would have ended up in his car forever and never actually making it to the guests. It sounds like the couple just forgot to send out the invite/it got misplaced/etc.

Post # 10
4770 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

@lilchicana:  I recieved a christmas card 2 weeks ago.  It was sent on time.  Just saying mail does weird things sometimes.

Post # 11
1252 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

Oh wow, never happened to me or anyone I know. Good thing they told you about their wedding well in advance and counted on you showing up! 

Post # 12
905 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2014

What is the postmark date? That will at least tell you when it was processed by the USPS. That said, we sent a Christmas card to family in Chile in early December and they recieved it in MARCH. I don’t know which country’s mail system screwed up, but it does happen from time to time. The other family members got their cards in time for Christmas. 

Post # 13
3461 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

Based on the constant references, sounds like a mailing issue not a B-list issue.

My ex and I were invited to an international wedding with old rsvp dates.  We were convinced we were b-list after other declines due to the out of country location, but didn’t mind.  (It was his boss at a small company.)  We declined due to the international trip factor.

Post # 14
260 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2018

lilchicana :  I haven’t had this where it sounded like we were invited from the beginning, but we received an invitation for one of FIs friend’s weddings about two weeks after the deadline. We just assumed we were B listed (small venue and not someone he was very close with) and immediately let them know we’d be thrilled to attend.

The funny part is, that friend is now going to be in our wedding party as we’ve all grown closer over the last couple of years.

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