Post # 1
I had to go anon for this because my normal account will be very easy for someone to identify me, and I don’t want to hurt the feelings of this bride if she came across it. With that being said, as soon as this happened I thought “I have to share this with the hive.”
I was recently invited to a wedding through a facebook event. I was so shocked and a bit insulted. I think this is extremely tacky. There are so many amazing and great ways to send a paperless wedding invitation (if you are trying to save costs, I have nothing against a paperless invite! it is a great idea if done right) I mean sites like punchbowl, pingg, greenenvelope, and etc. So I was just so surprised that they chose such a casual and impersonal way to invite their friends. It was like nothing was put into it either so as a guest I feel a bit insulted. They are obviously trying to save costs, however, family members will be receiving REAL invitations – so it as if the “young” (23-26yr olds – their age as well) friends aren’t good enough for an invite.
A little info about the couple: From what I have heard their wedding is going to feel more like a college party than a wedding. They are a pretty dysfunctional couple. I’ve been shaking my head ever since they got engaged; NO, ever since they started dating. This is just the cherry on top of the cake.
Anyone else invited to a wedding via facebook? Or other means that you found extremely tacky?
Am I being crazy to think this is tacky?? I mean come on, there are so many other great ways to go paperless and save money while still making your guests feel appreciated.
Post # 3
I think it’s a bit ridiculous that somehow wedding invitations need to be somehting more then any other party. I think you’re overracting by being inslted. Really? Why on earth would you be insulted that someone invited you to an event? Why does the invite matter so much?
If you’re insulted, ignore it and don’t go.
Post # 4
I did a Facebook invite because I added the people that doesn’t remember much and people I don’t talk to a lot but would be hurt if they weren’t invited 🙂 this is my second and we are paying so I DIY ‘d everything so cost of extra invitations wasn’t an issue it was just an informal invite kinda like trrhe friendship I have with them.
Post # 5
@secretbee22: I was literally just invited to a wedding via Facebook as well! It popped up in my notifications and I was like…. No way. We’re not invited to the ceremony, just the reception where we are asked to bring food.
The best part? I haven’t talked to this girl since high school (and we were only in a couple classes together) FIVE years ago.
Post # 6
If their wedding is going to be like a college party, then a Facebook invite at least fits the theme. Now whether it’s appropriate to treat a wedding like a college party is a different story. If you go, I suggest you not forget to bring a 12-pack of PBR for the happy couple.
Post # 7
Fiance (and i) got a facebook “save the date/we need your address” from an old friend of his over the summer. sadly, we won’t be attending the wedding, since it’s too far of a trip for us. but i was like, “seriously? facebook?” it irked me. i know why they did the fb thing, but it still left a bad taste in my mouth.
Post # 8
@secretbee22: You are being crazy to think it’s tacky, as judging your friends is mean and rude.
I just made a facebook event for my own wedding. 🙂 It is in place of save the dates, as people are starting to ask for details. I put it together last minute for those guests who needed to start making plans now, as I am still working on the invites.
Just relax, and stop being so judgemental.
Post # 9
How about because a wedding is not just another party?? She also knows that she sent out “real” invites, but apparently was not deserving of such piece of paper.
A FB invitation is highly impersonal and ugly. Like the OP stated, there are options for paperless invitations-it is unfortunate that the bride took the easiest way out.
With FB invites, I can only imagine how classy the wedding day will be. Good luck OP.
Post # 10
@imabridesmaid: In the end, that is what weddings are a party. OP said it wasn’t going to be a classy event by any means. I’m not sure why killing trees makes anything more personal, everyone recieves the same invite anyway…We live in a digital world, I’m sure the next generation will not be mailing invites. This is a non-issue for me.
Post # 11
@secretbee22: I’d be insulted if other friends got paper invites and I didn’t – but you said only family got invites, so I can understand that, esp. if they’re trying to cut costs.
I agree that there are better ways to do it, but I think people outside of wedding forums don’t know much about that stuff.
I can understand where you’re coming from, but they it’s not like they were trying to insult you, so don’t take it personally.
Post # 12
- Wedding: June 2014 - Baby #2 due Sep 2017
I am planning on doing a private facebook event for my wedding as it gets closer to the date as all my friends and family are in a different country, and they are all frequent users of facebook so it’ll be easy to keep in touch and keep them updated. They are all likely to RSVP on time and I don’t have to worry t stuff getting lost in international mail.
I will keep the guest list and ‘not comings’ anonymous and I plan to create a nice graphic, perhaps a save the date, as the cover photo.
I will give the official paper invitations when they arrive in the country for the actual wedding the day before or whenever so it’ll be a nice keepsake for them.
I think you’re overreacting, times are changing and this will probably be the norm in one generation.
Post # 13
@colorofmyheart: I sent personal facebook messages to all my college friends asking for their addresses. I feel like this is one of the only ways to get in touch with everyone nowadays. Plus it saves so much time. I personally would never do a facebook invite but just to ask for the address? That seems totally fine.
Post # 14
@secretbee22: While a FB invite may not be something that I would ever utilize, I actually think what’s tacky here is that you went through the trouble of creating a fake account to gossip online about some poor soul who thinks that they are your friend. Class is about so much more than having money or following the rules of proper party hosting. A classy person knows how to be gracious. You shouldn’t say anything about a person that you wouldn’t say to them directly.
Post # 15
@onceinalifetime122113: they created a facebook event, and added everyone. the info line said something like “we’re getting married -insert date, time and place cause i can’t remember them-“, and further down, it asked for addresses. it wasn’t a message, it was an event. that’s what turned me off. i dunno. it irked me. if it’d been an individual message? that’s fine. but it wasn’t. but that’s just my opinion. people are free to do what they please.