(Closed) Reception

posted 5 years ago in Reception
Post # 2
4104 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 2014

I don’t see why not. My cousin got married at city hall and then had a reception the next day. There’s not much difference. 

Post # 3
7604 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2014

It’s a tough call because when you elope, you are purposely excluding everyone from your wedding. seems a bit odd to then want them to all come celebrate it with you. Are there some special circumstances that would make people less confused by that?

Post # 4
2589 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2017 - Valleybrook Country Club

Usually eloping is to be very small so that would be like an oxymoron to elope with a reception. But whatever it’s your wedding. Maybe if you elope far away and then have a reception when you return might make sense. To each their own. 

Post # 5
2501 posts
Sugar bee

View original reply
tm21308:  you can do whatever you want. That said, I’m confused as to why you would want to do this? Typically, most people elope to AVOID the wedding planning/having a reception. So it seems a bit strange?

Post # 6
3437 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2017 - Poppy Ridge Golf Course

You can have whatever you want. My first marriage was confidential, no witnesses required. We took a limo to a nice park with a giant windmill and that was that. Told about 12 ppl to meet us for dinner if they chose and all 12 showed up. Wasnt even a fancy place just Olive Garden. My uncle strolled in fresh out the joint (jail) and it was a hilarious evening my friends still mention. But we never actually called it a reception.

Point is those who love you and wish to be there likely will no matter how you decide to do things. 🙂 Not everyone elopes to exclude others some do it to avoid the hassle and/or cost of wedding planning. Now that Im planning one I find myself thinking fondly of that simple park ceremony and dinner!

Post # 7
5387 posts
Bee Keeper

View original reply
tm21308:  You will get mixed opinions here. Some bees are adamant about you invite everyone to both ceremony and reception. I have no problem attending a reception only. There are a few couples who want a very intimate ceremony. I think what’s rude is having a ceremony and not inviting guests (or only some) to the reception. I’ve attended about 3 receptions only weddings. Two were elopements outside the US and one was only members of that specific church can attend a ceremony. As far as I’m aware no one batted an eye during all 3 receptions.  

Post # 8
7199 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2015

View original reply
tm21308:  People’s opinons differ greatly on this. Personally, I have attended several “receptions” for people who eloped and I think it’s perfectly fine. 

I will say this- my BFF had a VERY small destination wedding (just parents, two brothers, myself and my DH (then-BF) as guests) then a reception (about 70 guests) a couple months later. She was very disappointed that people didn’t seem to take it seriously. There were at about 10 no-shows (pretty large percentage!) and very few gifts. On the other hand, my friends who just had a “come celebrate with the newlyweds” BBQ type thing seemed perfectly happy with that. So just manage your expectations. If your wedding isn’t very traditional, don’t expect your guests to act traditional. 

Post # 9
2141 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2017

people that are asking, here in the england people do it because there are strict laws (just to make money) that prevent people having the wedding they want

you can marry at the registry (like a courthouse) for £45 with no guests (only on a wednesday morning before 10am here)

its £350+ to have guests and even more if you dont want a registry (you have to book a venue at a cost because the location has to have an expensive paid wedding license and pay traval of the registra)

the only other option is a CofE church wedding at £480

if you ‘elope’ on the cheap registry package you can then have a free mock ceremony or blessing saving £100s – its pretty common and means you can have a humanist ceremony anywhere like a beach/park/back garden etc…

Post # 10
1145 posts
Bumble bee

Usually eloping gets you out of having to invite other people. Are you specifically refering to eloping for the ceremony in another country/city and coming back for a reception at a later date? I’m quite confused why you would want to elope when you plan on inviting guests?

Post # 11
2260 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2020

Thats pretty much what I’m planning on doing. Anytime anyone asks if/when/how SO and I are getting married I just respond with “we’re planning on eloping” and the typical response is “oh I still want to come”. Its nice to know that people still want to celebrate your relationship even if they didn’t see you actually get married. So go right ahead!

On a side note, I would definitely splurge on photography (maybe even an videographer) since thats what you’ll end up relying on to showcase your ceremony at the reception. 

Post # 12
2869 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2017

Last fall a good friend of mine had a destination wedding in Hawaii with only immediate family present then 3 days later after they got home had a reception at a golf club with around 200 guests.  She was getting a lot of pressure from both sets of parents for having certain people in the bridal party and a certain style wedding, so the bride said screw it and had the destination wedding.  She did get grief from some aunts that weren’t invited to Hawaii, but in the end everything did work out ok, and ironically, one of the aunts said afterwards said having just the reception was a nice idea because it didn’t turn into an all day affair like most weddings are.

But looking back, my friend sometimes wishes she had just dealt with the stress and had the traditional wedding because she feels like she missed out on the fun of the wedding itself with more people than just the parents and siblings.

So while I think you can elope then have a reception, be prepared to answer questions and get some grief.

Post # 13
1292 posts
Bumble bee

Why are you eloping if you want a bunch of guests at the reception?

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