(Closed) Reception Difficulties-ugh

posted 9 years ago in Reception
Post # 3
Member
256 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

I would be bothered by her behavior as well. I can stand when people talk "down" to me. I am actually an ex-wedding planner myself and I have worked with people who think they know what’s best for every wedding just because they’ve been doing it so long.

My best advice to you is to stand your ground and start speaking up! The bottom line is it’s your day and let’s face it, you are paying for this thing (and weddings aren’t cheap). You need to get across to her in nicer terms that she kind of works for you and unless there is some lawful or logistical reason you absolutely can’t do something – your wedding will be just as you pictured it. If you dont want pedestals – tell her that and tell her that the next time you come your florist will be with you so you can get ideas on how to decorate the gazebo. Don’t give her the opportunity to tell you no or suggest other things.

Good Luck!

Post # 4
Member
66 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: September 2009

Well she might know a lot about the venue, etc. but clearly only you know what’s best for your wedding because only you (and your fiance) know what will make you happiest. I think if I were in your situation I would strike a communication approach along these lines:

1. Assert what I want as fact.  I wouldn’t ask for it, or apologize for it.  I would just state it.

2. If she offers alternatives, reassert what I want with explanation plain and simple "this is what I would like". 

3. If she pushes back again, unless there is some fabulous reason (i.e. its out of my budget), I would ask her to try to find a way to make what I want possible.  This whole,"we’ve never done it like that before" is no excuse.

4. At this point if she is resistant, I would remind her that this is why you hired her – to deal with finding a way to make your plans possible, and you would appreciate her efforts.

Have you already been through all of this? Well proceed next to:

5. Approach her boss and ask him/her to intervene to remind this person of their job in serving their customer.

By The Way, I think "bridezilla" is such an evil term to make women think they shouldn’t assert themselves.  You’re not obnoxious for wanting people you are paying to do what you’re paying them for. As long as you’re polite, you’re fine.

Post # 5
Member
2641 posts
Sugar bee

I think she’s looking out for her own interest.  I think she’s trying to get you to do things so it’s as easy as possible on her and her staff.  It’s definitely not the "bride knows best" attitude you’d like.  Stick to your guns.  If something really makes sense, give it to her.  But if you want your florist decorating the gazebo, to heck with her.

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